hedley Clubnobber's definitions

special

noun; cannabis-skunk soaked in 40% proof whiskey/vodka, etc, for a year, drunk in shot quantities with friends.

a)'That's not enough special?!'

b) 'Never mind the quantity, feel the spaceship'.

by Hedley Clubnobber August 27, 2006

desolation

a desolation: Describes most inner city areas or major British conurbations. Robbed of individuality by retailing corporations, bent politics, comprehensive education and architectural vandals over a period of decades. More atmosphere on the lunar surface, somewhat less ineteresting than watching paint dry.

a. 'This town is dead'.

b. 'It's a desolation of a place. Let's go to Cardiff before they finish that off too'.

by Hedley Clubnobber September 16, 2008

Harvard

A place where you can pay $100k.p.a for an education you can get in any mid-west whorehouse for $50.

He's a Harvard Man therefore he is stupid and spends lots of money on his son's/daughter's miseducation. (Similar to Yale, Oxford or Cambridge institutions)

by Hedley Clubnobber August 27, 2006

manci

pronouncewd 'man-key': dirty, filthy, grubby, grimey; derived from a person living in Manchester, UK, known to all surrounding towns as 'Mancs', and associated with the industrial revolution when everyone and everything was a stranger to soap.

a) oh, look at her/him! S/he's manci!

b) indeed, s/he does comes from south Lancashire.

by Hedley Clubnobber August 27, 2006

military intelligence

a contradiction in terms. it's a no-brainer.

they went looking for weapons of mass destruction in 2001, that Colin Powell's military intelligence said were there. as a result there are 150k dead civillians, around 12k dead soldiers and 25k wounded, as a direct result of the wars forced on Iraq and Afghanistan. He need have looked no further than any American state.....like Utah or Israel.

by Hedley Clubnobber September 27, 2006

comprehensive education

British socialist experiment (further enhanced by successive generations of hapless politicians) that forced fee paying schools out of business, raised the school leaving age and tried to give all children between 4 and 16 a basic education in several subjects. 'Basic' is about as good as it gets for most victims forced as they are into mind-numbing boredom, despair and violence. Most schools are like open, juvenile prisons. Still, American state schools make every one of 'em look like Oxford!

teenage pregnancy? routine bullying? can't read and write without the aid of 15 years further education? teacher's all suicidal? no future? no motivation? no prospects? It has to be comprehensive education!

by Hedley Clubnobber August 27, 2006

communist

A believer; specifically in a political-economic religion. Identical to fascist, fundamentalist, maoist, capitalist, banker. Believes most humans can contribute equally except those who contribute nothing, in which case they form the 'Blessed Leadership'.
Wishes to replace one form of expolitation with another to prove the point.
Believes in 'The State' but not in the 'individual'.
Doesn't believe in God but does believe in Gold (Spot the difference?> That's right!; there's 'L' in gold). Against natural law, believes opposites repel and, therefore, finds freedom confusing, worrisome & always dangerous.
Joyfully celebrates success by parading earth-cracking weapons from time-to-time and then explodes them, rendering large parts of the world uninhabitable.

Famous communist experiments in equality:
In the Soviet Union, everbody queued.
In China, everyone has the same haircut.
In Tibet, everyone is beaten regularly.
In Albania & Zimbabwe, everyone is dog-poor.
In the European Union they are preparing to queue, have the same haircut, be beaten regularly & become dog-poor.

by Hedley Clubnobber August 28, 2006