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Definitions by gnostic1

freckle wagon 

n. fictional conveyance that delivers freckles, nevi and lentigo to the homes of cute girls.
Wow! I see you kept the freckle wagon pretty busy when you were little.

What?
freckle wagon by gnostic1 July 24, 2011

busty-blausen 

n. well-endowed woman generally found serving Bavarian beer in amusingly ornate steins at Oktoberfests.
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Ve should go to Eckville and check out the busty-blausen mit de shirten-low and the lowen-brau.

Nein! I am allergen to oomp-pa-pa accordion music.
busty-blausen by gnostic1 July 23, 2011
n. someone who denies the blatantly obvious, usually for no apparent gain.
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Of course the Eckville Tigers are going to beat those Bentley Generals, they could probably beat the Edmonton Rush!

You are such a total keegstra. When are you going in for therapy?
keegstra by gnostic1 July 23, 2011

Red Deer 

place. Sparklingly clean, relatively disease free city cleverly placed between Edmonton and Calgary in the hub of the buried oil and dinosaurs belt. Home to many of the prettiest nurses on the planet and home to more country themed bars than is really sensible.

Red Deer was visited after the last ice-age by successive waves of paleolithic settlers who "kicked the tires" a bit but continued south to found empires in Mexico and Peru. Fur traders and cartographers such as Anthony Henday and David Thompson visited the area but also moved on. Finally a city was founded by Leonard Gaetz, a failed minister and successful land speculator who convinced the local natives to live in reduced circumstances to the west.

Oil is present in abundance and the wealth from it, and from grain growing, cheese production, gravel sifting, and ashphalt storage enriches the populace and makes them feel special ... very special.

Curling bonspiels, hockey tournaments, travelling to warmer climates and endlessly discussing ski wax keep the locals amused through the long cold winters.

Summers are filled with street art festivals featuring clown juggling and, often, heavy drinking.

The Red Deer river cuts through rocky strata that hold thousands of dinosaur fossils that begin to lose their magic after you have seen an eyefull.
Do you want to visit Red Deer and see the latest T. rex skeleton?

Is it a siamese twin or something, because otherwise I'd rather catch the sled dog race on TV.
Red Deer by gnostic1 July 18, 2011

touche bag 

n. sack or sports bag purpose-built to carry fencing swords, mask, uniform etc.
Excusez-moi. Has madamoiselle seen my touche bag magnifique?

Mais non! Nor do I wish to see it!

Perhaps madamoiselle understands not. La touche bag is something I slide over my sword to keep it clean.
touche bag by gnostic1 July 16, 2011

don the white hat 

v. phrase. surrender; lower one's standards. Inspired by Queen Elizabeth's refusal to put on any cowboy hats, feathered headresses, ball caps etc. that are offered but can be used in regard to any clothing item (tuxedo, grad gown) , job, dinner with in-laws etc.
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The prom is this weekend. Are you gonna don the white hat?

I'm a gonna go alright but I ain't no white hat donner.

Then you might not get no punch.

I'll tell you who's gonna get no punch and it ain't gonna be you!
don the white hat by gnostic1 July 14, 2011

duck hollow 

place. Little appreciated Canadian city with the distinction of producing more top-flight dart flingers and less good hockey players than anywhere else in Alberta; also a good source of shale, lignite coal and third-base men.

Birthplace of warm fusion-an eclectic physics pursuit, and home to the only hindu ashram in the greater Eckville region, Duck Hollow is well situated to sell tires to people coming off the badly maintained Lacombe-Rimbey bypass as well as to siphon tourists away from the Devonian fossil beds and into the Rocky Mountain Rickettsial Diseases Museum recently built on the disused grounds of the sanitorium.

The high school Reach For The Top team was recently second runner-up in the Provincial tournament, taking advantage of some opportune dart-related questions in the final short snappers.
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What's a bullseye worth?

I don't know but I bet those cool kids in Duck Hollow know.
duck hollow by gnostic1 July 13, 2011