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Definitions by george mcbob

blue light brigade 

(S. Afr.) VIP protection motorcade.

Blue light brigades consist of between five and twenty black SUVs with tinted windows and flashing blue lights, depending on the overinflation of the ego of the obnoxious fatcat contained therein.

Blue light brigades have been known to force honest taxpaying motorists off the road or even shoot at them. They don't stop a traffic lights, drive in emergency lanes and break every possible traffic law.

In South Africa, the proper road etiquette when encountering one is to drive into their lane and block them for as long as possible without endangering your own vehicle, hoot repeatedly and wind down your window to give them the finger. You should also politely request all your passengers to give them the finger too.
I almost got rammed by a blue light brigade the other day. There were 20 vehicles in it, so it must have been Jacob Zuma or someone. I blocked him for 15 seconds and gave him the finger though.
A kugel is a special breed of rich middle-aged woman living in Johannesburg. Originally, the word kugel only applied to Jewish women (a kugel a Jewish potato-based dish), but now applies to any spoilt housewife.

Very distinctive characteristics of kugels are: A very nasal accent, calling everyone "doll", looking down on people who don't live in the Northern Suburbs, mistreating their housekeepers, spending half their lives talking on a cellphone, intense Botox treatment, wearing leopardskin patterned clothes and driving fancy 4x4s but refusing to take them offroad.

They tend to congregate at Sandton City, talk about shoes, nails and other kugels, cheat on their husbands and only tip 5%. A classic stereotypical kugel is Gwen Anderson from the South African comic strip Madam and Eve.
Kugel: Like, you know what I'm saying doll, she knows her husbands having an affair with....(25 minutes pass)... anyway, I have to like hang up doll, my nails are almost dry and I have to hurry up to get my hair done... ok doll, mwah bye.
kugel by George McBob May 6, 2009
Vaginal Irrigation Packet.

This is in accordance with the principle that anyone who would call themselves a VIP, or insist on VIP treatment is inherently a douchebag.
There go the celebs heading for the VIP seats. Total bunch of douchebags.
VIP by George McBob May 6, 2009

Stiganate 

v. to drive really, really fast.

Named after the Stig in Top Gear. Of course no mortal can drive as fast as the Stig, although you may come close if you can Stiganate.
We're late. I'm gonna stiganate.
Stiganate by George McBob May 6, 2009

spill the tofu 

v. to drive really, really fast.

The expressing comes from the anime Initial D, where the hero Takumi is under the tutelage of his father, who makes him drive with a cup of water in his car in order to teach him to drive without spilling, since he delivers tofu. However, when he enters a race in the first episode, his father tells him he doesn't need the cup, and can drive as fast as he can.
We're late. I'm gonna spill the tofu.

train surfing 

An extreme sport popular in Soweto, South Africa.

It includes things like hanging onto a moving train and sliding your feet on the platform, standing on the roof and dodging powerlines, jumping on and off repeatedly, jumping from a bridge onto a moving train and jumping between carriages. The more dangerous the stunt, the better.

It is illegal, and fatalities are common
Sipho and Themba went train surfing from Dobsonville to Orlando.
In South Africa, one usually buys weed by the bankie. A bankie is the amount of weed that will fit in a bank coin bag (weed is not necessarily sold in a bank bag, but it is the most common container)
Score us a bankie, bru!
bankie by George McBob May 5, 2009