friend of bob's definitions

bad pickup lines

Speech device primarily employed by two factions of mankind: the truly pathetic and amateur comedians. Origins have been disputed, but it is widely thought that pickup lines, once upon a magical time, could win pussy if chanted with remarkable charisma and authenticity. Thanks to the combination of inevitability and human stupidity, pickup lines degraded into verses that invoke either uproarious laughter or further inalienation, but not the throes of sex.

Got a library card? Because I'm checking you out.

I scraped my knees falling for you.

You're like a box of Lucky Charms: you're magically delicious.

Got a gym card? Because you've been giving my mind a workout.

I lost my number. Can I have yours?

You sound tired. Wanna sleep with me?

Hey there. (use Clint Eastwood impression)

by friend of bob June 15, 2004

work

To perform an action with notable skill (not necessarily your job).

I can work a chessboard.

I can work Halo.

by friend of bob June 15, 2004

Boondock Saints

What everyone wishes they were, but nobody has the balls or weaponry available to effectively carry out the day-to-day duties of a Boondock Saint.

The movie deserves to be in some sort of movie hall of fame.

by friend of bob June 15, 2004

Fast Food Rockers

As an American, I stand in total awe in reverence to what pop music looks like across the pond. I mean, come on, they're NOT black!!!

I came very close to sampling their music, but in the deep recesses of my mind, I knew I would lose all respect for myself if I did. Thankfully, the only pleasures I indulge when it comes to the Fast Food Rockers are the pictures of the two hot chicks.

by friend of bob June 15, 2004

I see pussy!!

A common cry during my incipient stages of marijuana smoking. I would often hallucinate the female fun part everywhere I went, especially when gazing at star constellations (somehow they all ended up merging into one large vagina). Sadly ironic because I have yet to see a real one (except in porn, of course).

Me:HAHAHAHA..hahaha..HAHAHAHAHA
Other person: What?
Me: I SEE PUSSY!!!

by friend of bob June 15, 2004

Fear and Loathing

Emotions felt when attending a party heavily populated with douchebags and douche-driven whores (who account for much of American female teenagers).

In a frenzy of fear and loathing, I escaped the "jumpin spot" of the party and found a secluded corner, where I chain smoked and drank someone else's rum.

by friend of bob June 15, 2004

rifle report

The sound of dumping on some fools.

We blasted those niggas until the rifle report was heard by my beyatch.

by friend of bob June 13, 2004