dookeyboy's definitions

applology

1. The study of all things related to Apple, iPad, iPhone, iPod, Mac, etc. and the humble beginnings and future of the company, up to and including Steve Jobs' personal life.

2. The typical half-assed explanation and semi-remorseful corrective action proffered by Apple whenever one of its products has a less than stellar launch.

1. Dude, I'm taking Applology 101 at Kissass U this fall semester!

2. Dude, I appreciate Apple's applology and this nifty little $.59 case they provided for free so my iPhone 4.0 can finally get reception!

by dookeyboy November 20, 2010

jackwagon

a crybaby loser pussy-type who needs to grow some cajones and start acting like a man

Billy: "Dude, I can't get Ronnie to play tackle football with us 'cause he's too afraid of getting hit."

Jimmy: "It doesn't surprise me, he's always been a fuckin' jackwagon anyway."

by dookeyboy November 25, 2010

meter maid

A municipal employee who drives around metropolitan areas stalking and issuing innocent bystanders with parking tickets.

See also revenue police.

Dude, I had to bribe the meter maid with a five dollar bill so he wouldn't issue me a $25 parking ticket!

by dookeyboy November 24, 2010

winning

The recent bout of self-destructive behavior perpetrated by Charlie Sheen, as defined by the actor himself in the myriad of interviews he's given to the national press.

NBC's Jeff Rossen: "Charlie, you recently lost custody of your kids and got fired from your job as the lead actor on 'Two And A Half Men.' What's going on?"

Sheen: "C'mon, Jeff, isn't it obvious? WINNING!!!"

by dookeyboy March 30, 2011

gynosaur

a gynecologist dinosaur

Dr. Lickalottapuss, do you suppose there were many gynosaurs helping deliver babies in the Jurassic period?

by dookeyboy November 24, 2010

take care now

After a blase date, an ironic parting statement by the dumper inasmuch as he/she could actually care less about the dumpee's well-being because they don't expect to ever see them again.

Jasper: "Well... I had fun. I think it's great that we..."

Molly: "Uh huh... take care now."

by dookeyboy November 23, 2010

gas and match

to burn someone's possessions, usually out of anger or spite

Man, you see Marcus on da news in his drawlz wit' his house on fire?! I told him if he got caught creepin' that his lady would gas and match his shit, and sure enough I was right!

by dookeyboy November 23, 2010