Diane: "You can't spend your money from the grave, Dave."
Dave: "No you can't, so I'll spend it before I go!"
Diane: "What, you gonna buy some hookers?"
Dave: "No, spookers."
Diane: "What are spookers?"
Dave: "Dead hookers. They'll give me a nice boo job!"
Dave: "No you can't, so I'll spend it before I go!"
Diane: "What, you gonna buy some hookers?"
Dave: "No, spookers."
Diane: "What are spookers?"
Dave: "Dead hookers. They'll give me a nice boo job!"
by connorsji January 22, 2010
by connorsji May 08, 2008
A bottle that is urinated into by a long-haul trucker as he is driving and then thrown out the window.
Joe Bob threw a uritov cocktail out his window and splashed into the State Trooper's open window, getting him arrested.
by connorsji May 08, 2008
The fecal mojito is the cousin of the uritov cocktail. It consists of a bag that a long-haul trucker uses to take a dump in and the throws it out his window as he is driving.
Driving through Boston, my wife thought that there was a dead cat on the side of the road. I knew better. The son of a bitch in front of me threw a fecal mojito at me. I swerved to avoid the shit splatter, but I didn't avoid the follow up uritov cocktail.
by connorsji May 08, 2008
a girl that you would have sex with but never enter into a full-fledged relationship with
You have to slay a couple of dragons before you find your princess!
You have to slay a couple of dragons before you find your princess!
in business terms: in HR- A benefits specialist with no hope of promotion
Matt: "Joe, you slay that dragon yet?"
Joe: "No dude, she wants to be my girlfriend!"
Hey, you want to go dragon slaying tonight?
No, I already slew one today and then threw her out!
Matt: "Joe, you slay that dragon yet?"
Joe: "No dude, she wants to be my girlfriend!"
Hey, you want to go dragon slaying tonight?
No, I already slew one today and then threw her out!
by connorsji January 22, 2009
Jim: "What happened to your arm, Dave? Where did it go?"
Dave: "Well, last night, my wife was blinking a flashlight off and on in bed. I fell asleep and must have a narcolelptic seizure."
Jim: "What the hell is that?"
Dave: "Narcolepelepsy. Don't screw with me. I'm missing an arm."
Dave: "Well, last night, my wife was blinking a flashlight off and on in bed. I fell asleep and must have a narcolelptic seizure."
Jim: "What the hell is that?"
Dave: "Narcolepelepsy. Don't screw with me. I'm missing an arm."
by connorsji September 04, 2009
On The Beach: "Hey, look at that asstrocity over there. Someone should tell her to wrap a tarp over that thing
by connorsji January 16, 2009