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carl j. maltese's definitions

Hannah Montana

Just another damned clone produced by Bell Labs under contract to Disney. When she is all-used-up, they'll produce more to unleash on the public.
"Hannah Montana. Proof you can come from nowhere and bring it with you. Also, few adults know or even care that her last name is spelled with only two "n's", not three."
by Carl J. Maltese February 16, 2008
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UCSA

United Christian States of America.

What the Religious Right would like to see our country become.

Some very good descriptions of America becoming a theocratic tyranny can be found in "The Armageddon Crazy" by Mick Farren and "Revolt in 2100" by Robert A. Heinlein
"I could see the tattered stars-and-stripes with a large gold cross occupying the very center of it. This was the flag of the UCSA: the United Christian States of America.
God help us."
by Carl J. Maltese May 31, 2007
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Hanes grazer

Derogatory term for a homosexual male. First used by Howard Stern.
"Are you just another turd tapping Hanes grazer!?"
by Carl J. Maltese April 13, 2007
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SHIELD

Supreme Headquarters International Law-enforcement Division.

Fictional super-spy organization from Marvel Comics' "Nick Fury, Agent of SHIELD"

This "organization" also provided a thread of continuity within nearly all of Marvel Comics' titles from the mid-1960's until the early 1990's.
"Just as it looked like the end for Captain America, a helicopter full of SHIELD agents showed up in the nick of time!"
by Carl J. Maltese April 12, 2007
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howard stern

The greatest DJ who ever lived. Period.
The only man with any guts to stand-up to the Powers-That-Be and tell the uncensored truth!
The first truly alternative morning radio show worth listening to, as compared to the "Morning Zoo Crews."
The only one worth listening to.
The ONE!
"Howard Stern has the distinct honor of having a public rest-room named after him on the Jersey Turnpike!"
by Carl J. Maltese May 31, 2007
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Betz

"I dare to shout 'Betz!' the spoken name of the Ultimate Evil! I dare not ever utter It's Unspeakable Name, It's Unspoken Name, It's True Name!!"
by Carl J. Maltese April 15, 2007
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the joy of meaningless studies

What you experience in junior college, community college, and/or beauty school.
"After twelve+ years of elementary-junior-senior-high-school and an exciting job in the lucrative field of fast food preperation, I just can't wait to experience the joy of meaningless studies in junior college!"
by Carl J. Maltese July 16, 2007
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