5 definitions by balloonie-cat

Used to describe anything that, through the application of science so advanced it may as well be magic, exhibits seemingly impossible behaviors or properties. The key is that the behavior/property on exhibit only -seems- impossible; if the observer had an understanding of advanced science, it would make perfect sense. "Made of future" used to be applicable only in speculative fiction, but is increasingly appropriate in the context of the real world.
Usage "Wait...how does the thin fabric of a guard uniform stop a knife blade?" "Dude, the uniform is made of future". Note: actually, it's made of Kevlar fibers saturated with non-Newtonian goo that locks the fibers in place under sudden impacts, but "made of future" is simpler.
by balloonie-cat October 10, 2014
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Derived from the reverse spelling of "smarts", strams is a kind of inverse intelligence demonstrated when a person or company cleverly overcomes every obstacle between them and total failure. In order to demonstrate use of strams, the entity in question must be faced with multiple situations where an obvious, correct choice leads to success, while a more obscure, incorrect choice leads to another choice-situation or to failure.
When a delivery company replaces the correct address with an old, old address, then ignores the forwarding information AT that old address AND the email AND the phone number they have on file for you, finally deciding that, because they can't find your address, they better mail you a letter about it - that's strams.
by balloonie-cat December 10, 2010
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To unexpectedly encounter something surprising/disturbing/intriguing while surfing the Internet. The key is the unexpected - if you were actively searching for "puppies on bicycles", finding "puppiesonbikes.com" does not count as a net-stumble.
Check this site out - it's like IMDB for adult film stars. I net-stumbled on it after mistyping the address of IMDB.
by balloonie-cat October 10, 2014
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When a guy's cock and a gal's pregnant belly (i.e. her bump) are rubbed against each other for his pleasure.
When Carl's wife was pregnant, she would sometimes give him a bumpjob as foreplay.
by balloonie-cat March 2, 2015
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The (theoretical) opposite of the soda Mountain Dew. The name is derived from the antonyms of the words making up the name of the aforementioned soda. Presumably, as Mountain Dew is thirst quenching, sweet, and highly caffinated, Valley Dust would be intensly (perhaps fatally) dehydrating, sour, and coma-inducing.
I refuse to drink Valley Dust, as it almost knocked me out the last time I had it.
by balloonie-cat June 22, 2006
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