Definitions by aretegroup
punch line cock block
When a person not involved in telling joke interrupts the person who is telling joke, thereby flummoxing the person and causing the mistiming of the punch line.
Kevin was just about to utter “Ta-da,” the punch line, when Rob interjected with a question, only to punch line cock block Kevin.
punch line cock block by aretegroup July 30, 2019
soiled laundry quandary
That morning-after hesitation when a house guest wonders if they are obligated to wash their own sheets after having sex with a middle-aged bartender in a friend’s guest room.
Kevin stood outside Rob’s bedroom door, holding a bundle of sloppy, soaking sheets, frozen in a soiled laundry quandary.
soiled laundry quandary by aretegroup February 9, 2019
Tuchas tease
Tuchas tease by aretegroup January 11, 2019
Ringilingus
The act of licking a doorbell with a built in camera for a very long time in an effort to achieve notierity and/or sexual satisfaction.
Jeff wasn’t sure if Cory was home and knew he wasn’t after performing ringilingus to the camera doorbell. Jeff also wanted to ejaculate.
Ringilingus by aretegroup January 11, 2019
SPF Facial
When you ejaculate into a tube of facial sun
block and give it to your partner who refuses to accept a facial during sex.
block and give it to your partner who refuses to accept a facial during sex.
“How’s the sex with that new summer hottie you’re seeing?”
“Just OK. The only way I get close to finishing the way I like is to SPF Facial the sunblock.”
“Just OK. The only way I get close to finishing the way I like is to SPF Facial the sunblock.”
SPF Facial by aretegroup June 27, 2018
burner pad
An apartment that is rented out with the sole purpose of conducting activities you would not do at your own home.
Hey Michelle, how’d that online hookup date go?
Totally awesome. I had him call up a couple of his friends and acted like a total slut. Good thing we were at my burner pad. I don’t need them knowing where I live.
Totally awesome. I had him call up a couple of his friends and acted like a total slut. Good thing we were at my burner pad. I don’t need them knowing where I live.
burner pad by aretegroup June 25, 2018
Dutch dusting
When you purposefully fart in someone’s bed to retaliate or preemptively take action against what you think they may do to you.
Kitty: “That guy who checked into room 3400 was a real asshole to the bell hop.”
Kim: “I know, I am Dutch dusting his bed when I clean the room today.”
Kim: “I know, I am Dutch dusting his bed when I clean the room today.”
Dutch dusting by aretegroup June 17, 2018