Yet Another Josh Cohen's definitions

manage expectations

corporate doublespeak for "we don't want to do our best, so let's make sure people think we're doing our best without revealing that we're not doing our best" -- anything in which you have to "manage expectations" means you could probably devote more time and effort to making things better, but you just don't feel like it

Marketing has to manage expectations of our new software package so that the boss doesn't make us do any more work.

by Yet Another Josh Cohen January 13, 2007

noodle incident

Something that happened in the past. No one talks about it, no one knows exactly what it was. But everyone agrees that it was something embarassing or bad.

From "Calvin and Hobbes".

(At a 20-year High School Reunion)
Wife: Why is everyone looking at you funny?
Husband: They must not have forgotten the noodle incident.
Wife: You never told me about that. What was it?
Husband: ... ... it was... the noodle incident. (looks away shamefully)
Wife: (goes off to find someone to explain this to her)

by Yet Another Josh Cohen September 22, 2006

suicide lane

A lane on a roadway that, depending upon the time of day, changes direction of travel. Sometimes, as in Snellville, Georgia, the direction of travel is noted by an electric sign every 200 feet hanging across the highway. Other times, as in parts of Maryland, there is nothing but a sign.

Example:

| 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 |

From 5am to noon, lanes 1, 2, 3, and 4 are Southbound, lane 5 is a turn lane, and lanes 6 and 7 are Northbound. From noon to 8pm, lanes 1 and 2 are Southbound, lane 3 is a turn lane, and lanes 4 through 7 are Northbound.

The suicide lanes on 78 always creep me out just a bit.

by Yet Another Josh Cohen December 28, 2005

genre twist

The "twist ending" that pervades science fiction, horror, mystery, and fantasy writing, television, or film -- basically, anything that might get the label "genre". The classic example is that Bruce Willis was dead the entire time.

Marlene: Hey, did you watch Criminal Minds last week?

Jill: Yeah, but I figured out the genre twist just before they revealed the kid was the killer.

Marlene: I got it before the end of the second commercial break.

by Yet Another Josh Cohen April 27, 2009

prius tetris

When driving a Prius, you can view a bar-graph of your fuel consumption over the past 30 minutes. A "prius tetris" is when you go five consecutive minutes (or more) at 99.9 miles per gallon. This shows on your bar-graph as a long, straight bar, similar to the four-high bars in Tetris.

No wonder you don't need any gas! You're always getting a prius tetris!

by Yet Another Josh Cohen March 10, 2009

facebook singing

The practice of, when you see a song lyric on Facebook or another social networking website, singing the next lyric. Usually someone will add a third, then a fourth, and so on.

(originally coined by Sethual Chocolate)

Jeff Smith says I believe I can fly

John Jones says I believe I can touch the sky

Kim German says I think about it every night and day

Phyllis Seymour wants to spread my wings and fly away

Andrew Rickenbacker just doesn't understand all this facebook singing.

by Yet Another Josh Cohen March 30, 2009

mrha

"Message received, humor acknowledged." On the internet, everyone types lol when they really aren't laughing out loud. This is a way to say "I am making you aware that I have received your link/message/quotation and discovered that it was indeed humorous. I did not, however, laugh out loud."

You: "Hey, check out this picture on the FailBlog!"

Me: *click click click* "mrha"

by Yet Another Josh Cohen January 18, 2009