YAWA's definitions

Pandemic Prophet

In direct contrast to Pandemic Denialism; an attempt to TRANSFORM the reality of a well documented and chronicled failure to lead into the fantasy of precognitive crisis awareness and ahead-of-the-curve responsiveness.

Hold on a minute, let me get this straight. So the coronacrisis isn't a hoax, it's not a media over reaction, it's not just another partisan attack, it's not just the flu'... now you're the Pandemic Prophet crushing the invisible enemy with spectacular efficiency and effectiveness.

Yeah, and if it's repeated enough times it will BE reality...

by YAWA April 19, 2020

Social Media Sabotage

The publication of uneditable, unsubstantiated mis-information by highly irresponsible social media influencers and chaos-fueled alternative media outlets.

Hey, I just read a blog that said the whole city of Miami has been over-run by COVID-19 ZOMBIE CORPSES. I sent it to all of my Farcebook, Instacrap and Snatchchat friends...
There should be severe penalties for Social Media Sabotage that further threaten the security of our friends, family and nation. With any luck one of those zombies will chew off your texting-fingers...stupid ass wipe.

by YAWA March 22, 2020

it's worth it for...the wall

The perspective of the privileged and out-of-touch, that any sacrifice can be justified in order to satisfy an unrealistic, expensive and ineffective Presidenial campaign promise.

I haven't gotten a paycheck for weeks, can't afford my insulin injections, food for my family, car payment or rent. But it's worth it for...the Wall. Right?

by YAWA January 25, 2019

COVosmia

The entirely random impact on the sense of smell created by COVID-19 infection, both in terms of derangement and duration.

Hey, did you lose your sense of smell with COVID?
Kinda. For awhile, I couldn't smell anything. Then EVERYTHING smelled like shit. And I do mean raw sewage, bro.
Is it better now?
Things have improved, but for some reason peanut butter smells like garlic and beer smells like asparagus piss.
Damn, that sucks! But that's COVosmia for ya.

by YAWA February 25, 2021

snapsurveillance

A double-secret condition of which the person in question is completely unaware; due to an affinity for weapons, knives, modified trucks or harsh language the targeted individual is deemed by friends, family and co-workers as fragile, unstable, and likely to 'snap' into mass-murder mode at any given moment.

Oh shit, Billy's at the gun shop again. Even though he's a surgeon and spent most of his life helpin' folks, there's no tellin' when he's gonna blow...better put that one under snapsurveillance immediately.

by YAWA October 16, 2017

gift of gab

Yet another offering in the category of brain numbing, extremist and irresponsible social media sites chock-full-O COVID conspiracy theories, vaccine misinformation and underground anti-science propaganda.

Hey, did you hear on Twitter that the my pillow guy is going to be reinstated as vice president when SCOTUS overturns the 2020 election?
Ummm, no. But I did read that the vaccine causes yer liver to melt and yer dick fall off.
I KNEW IT! THAT'S WHERE MY DICK WENT.
Yup, that's the gift of gab.

by YAWA August 28, 2021

pooper-bowl

A less-than 'super' bowl; a game filled with interceptions, punts, missed field goals, short-yard gains and very few drives resulting in actual points scored.

WTF?! Is ANYONE going to fucking score a touchdown in this pooper-bowl--they should all get a discount for those ultra-expensive, unintelligible commercials.

by YAWA February 3, 2019