heinous bush pig

A girl so big and nasty that there's no other term to describe her. Generally over 5'9", over 200 pounds and lacking in hygeine.

Dude, look at that heinous bush pig! I haven't seen one so rough since last week when you caught the clap!

by Uncle Kurtie November 09, 2006

ALL PRO COCK HAMMER

When your giant clam basher performs so well that your woman advertises to her friends causing your dance card to be full at all times.

She has a lot of little hottie girlfriends, so I gave her the all pro cock hammer! My phone hasn't stopped ringing !

by Uncle Kurtie October 28, 2006

mumms

It's when the chick is hot, but you question her hygiene!! You dont want her rubbing her dirty dick beaters on your junk. Instead you allow her to cup her hands and play catcher for your load of man milk. When you finish, you tell her to wash up and get the fuck out.

Chuck, she was so smelly, I could only let her do the mumms. Tell your sister to take a bath!

by Uncle Kurtie June 22, 2007

SKIM MILK TITTIES

Titties that look like two fried eggs nailed to a 2x4. More commonly referred to as " banana titties ". Generally found on women that you wouldn't fuck on a bet.

We were at the party, she took off her shirt and scared the shit out of the whole crowd with her gnarly skim milk titties.

by uncle kurtie November 14, 2006

HEY MOE

It's when you sling the cock back and forth across your significant others' face in a kind of slapping motion 4-5 times, then you take the hardwood and poke them in either eye while yelling "hey moe". Then get the hell out of there!

Chuck: Hey David, are you keepin' yer ol' lady in line?
Dave: Well, she started to act up, so I whipped out the lumber and gave her the "hey moe" and that fixed the problem!

by Uncle Kurtie April 12, 2007

dispinchloafia

You know when you're on the shitter, really gruntin' one out, spend 20 minutes hammerin' the commode, and when you've finished, there's only two little knobs of doo in the bowl.

Dude, what took so long?

Sorry man, I have a bad case of "dispinchloafia" today.

by Uncle Kurtie November 16, 2006

tarantuknuckle

Its when the labia of your woman covers the panocha completely, it looks like the exposed fangs of the Congo Bird spider ( tarantula ). Looks very inviting until she sinks the fangs in to fuck your life to pieces.

Man, she has the greatest lookin tarantuknuckle I've ever seen, I hope it eats my dong.

by uncle kurtie December 29, 2006