When your giant clam basher performs so well that your woman advertises to her friends causing your dance card to be full at all times.
She has a lot of little hottie girlfriends, so I gave her the all pro cock hammer! My phone hasn't stopped ringing !
by Uncle Kurtie October 28, 2006
A girl so big and nasty that there's no other term to describe her. Generally over 5'9", over 200 pounds and lacking in hygeine.
Dude, look at that heinous bush pig! I haven't seen one so rough since last week when you caught the clap!
by Uncle Kurtie November 09, 2006
It's when the chick is hot, but you question her hygiene!! You dont want her rubbing her dirty dick beaters on your junk. Instead you allow her to cup her hands and play catcher for your load of man milk. When you finish, you tell her to wash up and get the fuck out.
by Uncle Kurtie June 22, 2007
Titties that look like two fried eggs nailed to a 2x4. More commonly referred to as " banana titties ". Generally found on women that you wouldn't fuck on a bet.
We were at the party, she took off her shirt and scared the shit out of the whole crowd with her gnarly skim milk titties.
by uncle kurtie November 14, 2006
It's when you sling the cock back and forth across your significant others' face in a kind of slapping motion 4-5 times, then you take the hardwood and poke them in either eye while yelling "hey moe". Then get the hell out of there!
Chuck: Hey David, are you keepin' yer ol' lady in line?
Dave: Well, she started to act up, so I whipped out the lumber and gave her the "hey moe" and that fixed the problem!
Dave: Well, she started to act up, so I whipped out the lumber and gave her the "hey moe" and that fixed the problem!
by Uncle Kurtie April 12, 2007
Feminine protection for fat ass broads. It looks like a swamp cat-tail on steriods. Used specifically to "Tampoon" a fat bitch on her period.
by Uncle Kurtie November 13, 2006
Its when the labia of your woman covers the panocha completely, it looks like the exposed fangs of the Congo Bird spider ( tarantula ). Looks very inviting until she sinks the fangs in to fuck your life to pieces.
by uncle kurtie December 29, 2006