concern for my Cheetos

when a friend worries about crunchy snacks getting too moist

Karl was preparing his snack bowl with Cheetos, apples and carrots when his roommate, Larissa, asked "won't that make your Cheetos soggy?" Karl replied: "no not at all but your concern for my Cheetos is greatly appreciated"

by Uncle Joosie March 05, 2020

Sticker Scolding

when your frustrated bestie sends Google Hangouts sticker with a clock

Emmet and Salvador were chatting via Hangouts and Sal got a work call; after waiting a few minutes Emmet became impatient and sent a Purple Cat sticker holding a clock. When Sal hung up he saw the sticker and replied "oh I KNOW you didn't just engage in Sticker Scolding, bitch."

by Uncle Joosie August 14, 2020

SignalGate

Worst national-security scandal in American history

Casino Mobster's administration, teeming with unqualified-Kremlin hacks, used Signal to discuss a bombing campaign in Yemen and inadvertently added a high-profile journalist to the group chat—who then proceeded to publish receipts of the conversation he saw. SignalGate scandal was born, implicating all of Donald Trump's compromised assets like Whiskey Pete and Tulski Gabbard.

by Uncle Joosie March 27, 2025

prospefity

when dopey right-wingers try to tweet about prosperity

Senator Mike Lee tried to scold everybody about how representative democracy isn't the objective of voting. In addition to being a cunt Mr. Lee misspelled "prosperity" as "prospefity" and proceeded to get deeply ratioed and dragged online.

by Uncle Joosie October 08, 2020

Shmessy

messy shade

Kenya brought Cookie Lady to lunch to ambush Tanya about her about the boyfriend's dalliances. "that's some fucked up Shmessy, girl" Cynthia said, which then caused a fight with Kenya.

by Uncle Joosie February 17, 2020

Dalmatian Shake

When a kid or adult gets out of a bath and shakes like a Dalmatian

Bob finished a bubble bath and his partner Karla was brushing her teeth. After he got out, Karla told him to "do the Dalmatian Shake!" and Bob rolled his eyes

by Uncle Joosie March 27, 2025

dry bowl salute

when you poop in a dry toilet and the turd stands on end like a soldier going to battle

Timmy came home turtling badly so he dashed to the toilet; when he finished Timmy got up and saw a dry bowl salute—a brown turd standing on end saying “SIR YES SIR” before getting flushed away.

by Uncle Joosie November 13, 2018