Cletus had an unusually difficult poop so he spent a few minutes with his ass splasher and felt a LOT better.
by Uncle Joosie July 21, 2019
"I'm sorry" in VERY passive voice
India Ferrah made shit up on Alexis Mateo during 'RuPaul's Drag Race AllStars' Season 5 and tried to serve her best Drag Queen Apology aka Apolo-lie to clean up her tattered reputation. "I need to sincerely apologize for things that were said. If you were offended I'd like to directly apologize for actions taken in the past and it was never my intention to repeat an untrue thing that was mentioned."
by Uncle Joosie August 14, 2020
Carla was excited to have a super-chill maskless drinks party with her gal pals after getting vaccinated. When Suzette arrived at her apartment she was positively joyous. "GIRL. we been cooped up for a damn year and, after getting vaccinated, I'm ready to relax and catch up." Carla replied, equally happy, "honey you're Relaxxinated and ready to go! I got you!"
by Uncle Joosie May 23, 2021
Timmy's butthole was feeling quite itchy and aggravated when he woke up on Sunday. He turned to wife Sally and said "ugh I have Lurking Piles from all that pizza we ate this weekend; hoping those 'roids drop soon so I can get over it"
by Uncle Joosie November 30, 2020
Betty was startled awake by daughter Harriet for the 3rd time that night, and Betty, bleary-eyed, thought to herself "fucking hell Baby needs a Benadryl." But, knowing drugs are not the answer, Betty rocked her to sleep and put her back in bed.
by Uncle Joosie September 13, 2021
"Digitization supercharges financialization," writes Cory Doctorow about Autoenshittification. "amid all the complaining about cars getting stuck in the Internet of Shit, there's still not much discussion of why the carmakers are making their products less attractive, less reliable, less safe, and less resilient by stuffing them full of microchips"
by Uncle Joosie July 24, 2023
An alert popped up on Lauren's phone one morning that she thought was an eggplant; when she opened it Lauren realized she'd just received an very impressive Prime Meat Text from Bezos, Amazon's Founder.
by Uncle Joosie June 20, 2019