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Uncle Joosie's definitions

Podium Liars

"press secretaries" under trump
when Kaleigh McEnany gave her final gaslighting session before trump left for MarALago Carol turned to her wife Sue in disgust. "my god, these fuckers," she exclaimed. "Spicer, Huckabee, Grisham and even this dolt Keelie are all Podium Liars and I can't wait for Jen Psaki."
by Uncle Joosie March 31, 2021
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Bannister Boy

Gay roommates Carl & Tim were sitting around watching the news, learning that Jarvanka wasn't totally truthful about their 1/6 testimony. Carl turned to Tim and said, "that Jared Kushner needs to be bent over a bannister and plowed by a BBC." Tim agreed, saying "Bannister Boy. absolutely"
by Uncle Joosie June 22, 2022
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Filter Loon

folk who rely on enhancement apps to make themselves look pretty
Charles was scrolling Facebook the other day and stumbled on Bob's new profile picture, which looked absolutely nothing like him. "What the F is that and who am I looking at?" Charles exclaimed. "Bobby is totally unrecognizable and a little bit nuts. IRL he looks like a high-school janitor but on Facebook he's a supermodel! Bob is definitely a Filter Loon." Charles logged off and went for a walk.
by Uncle Joosie January 2, 2023
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Jaden Has a Sad

media obsession with what upsets white kids
NBC Nightly News ran a segment about some asshole-teen in North Carolina not wanting to wear a mask at school. "some say masks are good; others say they're bad" the reporter noted. when Brenda heard that she rolled her eyes and said "aww, Jaden has a sad"
by Uncle Joosie December 1, 2021
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Derployed

when Elon "Elmo" Musk's security detail gets deputized
Right after Apartheid Clyde ran around CPAC with a chainsaw word got out that the famous spreader of seed had his private-security detail granted special powers (aka "Derployed") by U.S. Marshal Service. which means we now have an unelected dolt upcycling his own bodyguards into a government temporarily run by transnational mob
by Uncle Joosie February 21, 2025
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Chyron Cussing

When mainstream media outlets like CNN and MSNBC have "shithole" in their chyrons as a direct quote of a government official.
Racist asshole Donald Trump called Africa a bunch of "shithole countries" so in order to quote him accurately TV news was forced into some beautiful chyron cussing.
by Uncle Joosie January 12, 2018
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Stefanikking

Representative Elise from New York was grandstanding, lying and obfuscating during Trump impeachment hearings; her desperate Stefanikking was patently obvious to millions watching
by Uncle Joosie November 16, 2019
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