The Mumbling Manchildren's definitions

Red Christmas

The event of your wife or girlfriend being on their period for Christmas.

Steve: "You gonna get some holiday fanny this Christmas, Tom?"
Tom: "No, Steve. Not this year, buddy. It's going to be a Red Christmas."

by The Mumbling Manchildren April 21, 2018

The Law of Pho

The blessed event of a girlfriend who acknowledges you are not feeling well and, despite being menstrual as all hell, brings over pho take out anyway. And maybe even sucks your dick with her onion breath- known as "getting extra meat". A swallow is known as "slurping the leftover broth".

I found her man. I found her. It's The Law of Pho for real. Complete with Extra Meat ! And she slurped the leftover broth!

by The Mumbling Manchildren December 1, 2017

Ass Mumbles

Simply put: smallish flatulence just before taking a shit.

Honey, get out of the bathroom, now. I've got the ass mumbles and she's gonna blow.

by The Mumbling Manchildren February 8, 2010

Auric Skeet Syndrome

A particular rare genetic mutation where the sufferer projects golden glitter from the penile glands instead of semen.

"Honey, this is just something you are going to have to get used to. Glitter is a part of my sex life. I suffer from Auric Skeet Syndrome."

by The Mumbling Manchildren October 29, 2017

Buster Creek

The rarest of events... The most lauded of all early sexual summits... to both share in the end of a woman's virginity and making her squirt at orgasm in the same act.

"Alden, we finally did it, Willow and I made love last night. It was so magical. I'm not normally one to kiss and tell, certainly not brag about my first sexual experience, but I have to tell someone. It was... I think its called... a Buster Creek. I've never seen her so happy. My life is changed forever. My life's goal will forever be to bring her that kind of ecstatic joy as often as possible. And next time... I'll be sure to lay down some towels."

by The Mumbling Manchildren March 25, 2019

Inverted Banjo

When one sexual partner rubs their prolapsed rectum against their partners anus.

Grandpa loved to tell me about the last time he gave grandma the inverted banjo before she passed away.

by The Mumbling Manchildren October 4, 2017

Rhinhole Cowboy

A certain breed of ranch hand who prefers a type of chaps constructed holly of sewn together rhinoceros anuses.

The tanned and cured rhinoceros anal dermis is known to be both durable and breathable.
Additionally, it has been found to have repellant qualities, deterring large Savannah predators, such as lions and rich old white men.

Did you see that man over there in the produce section, Beth? He looks to be a true-blue Rhinhole Cowboy. So sexy in his rhino-anus chaps and ten gallon wildebeest pube hat!

by The Mumbling Manchildren December 20, 2017