The Grottomaster's definitions

covfefe

press covfefe n.-- a non-magical coven's, (in this instance, the press), snafu editorial product. The fefe suffix stems from an extension of snafu, originally a WW II military slang acronym that meant "situation normal -- all fucked up". In "covfefe", the acronym is extended to "situation normal -- all fucked up, for each and everyplace", ergo: "snafufeae". Given that we are in the era of texting our messages, this rather cumbersome acronym has been corrupted to "snafefe" which rolls off the tongue much more eloquently. From this point it became a simple matter to prefix "snafefe" with "coven", thus combined, "covfefe", a coven, fucked up, everywhere.

"It's just more examples of covfefe from the western media."

by The Grottomaster June 1, 2017

sausage

An archaic reference, typically by soldiers of other European nations, to an attractive and curvy young German lass. One of the oldest *War and Peace* translators, Nathan Haskell Dole, coined this term in the late 1800s in his erudite rendition of Tolstoy's Magnum opus.

"Check out that sausage -- she's a sure lay!" noted the Russian soldier to his comrade.

by The Grottomaster November 27, 2011

BEAST-loaf

A semi-acronym for a particular type of processed sandwich loaf, in this case, Brain, Eyeball, Anus, Snout, and Tail loaf. *Deluxe* BEAST-loaf costs a little more and is made up of: Brain, Eyeball, Anus, Snout, and *Titty*.

At Arkansas wedding receptions they typically serve Moon Pies and BEAST-loaf sandwiches.

by The Grottomaster May 10, 2011

ghost

A corruption and/or diminution of the phrase "G-spot Host", which is a person who sponsors an orgy, usually at their home.

Sally is the ghost for tonight's get-together. Are you going to go straight or French?

by The Grottomaster May 21, 2011

Mucous Mary

A snot and tomato juice highball punctuated with 100-proof vodka, all shaken with ice, garnished with two pimiento pits on a toothpick.

Bartemder, take that little snot over in the corner a Mucous Mary

by The Grottomaster April 13, 2011

re-retard

A dumbass who eventually wises up and then subsequently moves to Berkeley, California.

The Berkeley Welcome Wagon visited two new re-retard residents today.

by The Grottomaster April 13, 2011

piss test

Typically, these are mandatory tests administered at the behest of law enforcement, a court, an employer, or a medical clinic. The objective of the test, which is conducted by means of urine analysis, is different depending upon who orders it. Tests administered by law enforcement, the court, or an employer are conducted to determine if narcotic or illegal drugs are present in one’s urine. If it is present it will likely result in being charged with a crime or, the revocation of probation or, being fired. The purpose of a medical clinic mandated urine test is to make sure that a particular prescribed drug is present in one’s urine and, if it is not, or if non-prescribed drugs are present, the patient is issued no more narcotic prescriptions and is usually dropped as a patient of that facility. The underlying purpose of this test is to make sure that the patient is not selling his or her medication. If s/he has no presence of the prescribed drug in his or her system then it is assumed that they have unlawfully sold their medicine. Unfortunately, these tests are not one-hundred percent accurate.

I failed my piss test and the pain clinic dropped me as a patient.

by The Grottomaster May 9, 2015