13 definitions by The Cap N'

1
1. A made up legal term that has no statute because the law sees these creatures as nuisance animals.

2. The completely legal and responsible activity of eliminating trash pandas from your neighborhood or property so as to preserve the cleanliness of the area and rid it of diseased pest.
1. Some turds went on YouTube and accused this guy of raccoon murder. Turns out, there's no such thing.

2. I was tired of half the trash cans being tipped over and the garbage being scattered throughout the neighborhood. So I went on a raccoon murder spree.
by The Cap N' July 21, 2020
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2
1
n. The distinct sound of chapped butt cheeks breaking the adhesion caused by a combination of caked skin, body hair, and fecal matter.
2
v. The act is separating the fleshy portions of the buttocks where the left and right gluteus maximus join at the anus creating a sound similar to opening old velcro.
1: I had to use the airport bathroom after a long flight and my ass made a shripp.

2: I shripped so loud that the two guys in the stall next to me giggled and one said, "Sounds like a virgin".
by The Cap N' April 24, 2021
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3
Rubbing ones palms together vigorously with at least four fingers of each hand inserted into your partner's anus or vagina in an effort to stimulate an orgasm.
I finished up but, was having trouble getting that loose hole hot so I hit it with the ol' Apache Firestarter and they came like a first class package. Beat up and late.
by The Cap N' July 21, 2020
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4
When you're life is so meaningless you go out of your way to get killed by the police or a city bus in the hopes that your surviving family who wants nothing to do with your sorry ass anyways will get half the money the courts award you at the taxpayers expense. The other half goes to the lawyers and Al Sharpton.
Yeah... He was a gud boy. He was get 'n his life back together. He was going to community college and trying to record his rhymes. He dindu nuff 'n and the police shot 'em. He goan git fat ghetto life insurance doh...
by The Cap N' May 19, 2021
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5
(Phrase) - description of person dying, usually from a cranial GSW that results in the body going limp in a fashion similar to a wet pasta noodle.
Shooter: "I'm not sure if I got him"

Spotter: "Yeah you shot him in the head and he went limp noodle spaghetti dead"
by The Cap N' April 13, 2021
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6
1. Operation Spartan Shield (OSS), Operation Enduring Freedom, the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia, and OSS again without ever having your unit in the same place for the same unified effort so as not to mass force and be effective.

2. A tour in Southwest Asia that is analogous to plugging a hole in a dam with your fingers only to find it springing a leak somewhere else.

3. The worst 14 months of your life.
1. Remember OSSOEFKSAOSS when we were spread all over the place and had a scavenger hunt for those slack jawed idiots equipment?

2. Oh, by the way, before you go home from OSSOEFKSAOSS, you're going to have to quarantine for two weeks after quarantining for two weeks after living in an isolated population where you quarantined for two weeks.

3. OSSOEFKSAOSS was the worst deployment of my life.
by The Cap N' May 19, 2021
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7
1. Any cloth article that has been saturated with jizz and worn for a prolonged period of time to the point that the fibers have been broken down and holes are now present. This item is usually a serious risk of infection to the wearer and others who come into contact with it.

2. A Snuggy.
Karl has been in quarantine for two weeks. He's not sick but, if he keeps wearing that Ottawa jizz rag, he will be.
by The Cap N' August 10, 2020
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