TR Arterburn's definitions

Blissignorance

A state of deliberate or fortuitous unawareness maintained to preserve one’s happiness or peace of mind; the specific comfort derived from not knowing the truth.

It is a kind of narcotic blissignorance that keeps the middle classes from revolting against the absurdity of their condition.

by TR Arterburn December 3, 2025

Reverse Teetotaler

A person who abstains strictly from water, tea, coffee, and other non-alcoholic beverages, professing to consume only fermented or distilled liquors; an individual who avoids sobriety with the same rigor a teetotaler avoids alcohol.

The club is populated by reverse teetotalers who view the tea urn with deep suspicion and the gin bottle with reverence.

by TR Arterburn December 2, 2025

drift tot

A toddler cranking out swerves and skids on a three-wheeler.

The little girl—a drift tot on a Big Wheel—laid down half-donuts on the bigger-kid-commanded concrete of the skatepark.

by TR Arterburn December 4, 2025

climbing crib critter

Mature baby who bolts from the stroller and jets up the climbing wall at the inflatable play center.

Somebody grab that climbing crib critter before they get to the top of the rock wall!

by TR Arterburn December 4, 2025

McJagger Satisfaction

A paradoxical state of restless fulfillment; the energetic display of discontent or complaint (”I can’t get no...”) performed precisely because it is lucrative and crowd-pleasing to do so.

The band finished the set with a kind of McJagger satisfaction, howling about how miserable they were while counting the gate receipts with their eyes.

by TR Arterburn December 3, 2025