TR Arterburn's definitions
A person who abstains strictly from water, tea, coffee, and other non-alcoholic beverages, professing to consume only fermented or distilled liquors; an individual who avoids sobriety with the same rigor a teetotaler avoids alcohol.
The club is populated by reverse teetotalers who view the tea urn with deep suspicion and the gin bottle with reverence.
by TR Arterburn December 2, 2025
Get the Reverse Teetotaler mug.A paradoxical state of restless fulfillment; the energetic display of discontent or complaint (”I can’t get no...”) performed precisely because it is lucrative and crowd-pleasing to do so.
The band finished the set with a kind of McJagger satisfaction, howling about how miserable they were while counting the gate receipts with their eyes.
by TR Arterburn December 3, 2025
Get the McJagger Satisfaction mug.A state of deliberate or fortuitous unawareness maintained to preserve one’s happiness or peace of mind; the specific comfort derived from not knowing the truth.
It is a kind of narcotic blissignorance that keeps the middle classes from revolting against the absurdity of their condition.
by TR Arterburn December 3, 2025
Get the Blissignorance mug.The little girl—a drift tot on a Big Wheel—laid down half-donuts on the bigger-kid-commanded concrete of the skatepark.
by TR Arterburn December 4, 2025
Get the drift tot mug.Mature baby who bolts from the stroller and jets up the climbing wall at the inflatable play center.
by TR Arterburn December 4, 2025
Get the climbing crib critter mug.A member of a decentralized, frequently outlaw, vigilante movement dedicated to the disruption or destruction of artificial intelligence and automated systems, viewing AI as an existential “scourge” or a blight upon human creativity. From "baldknobber"— a member of a vigilante group that operated in the Ozarks region of southwest Missouri between 1885 and 1889, as well as the Baldknobbers Jamboree Show based in Branson, MO.
Their garage band routine is pure botknobber theater: they refuse to use auto-tune, often use instruments they built themselves, and would rather die than play a Gen AI song..
by TR Arterburn December 5, 2025
Get the botknobber mug.A humorous blend of WRITE v. (denoting creation and composition) + RIGHTEOUS adj. (suggesting moral or creative conviction) + COINER n. (an inventor of new words).
The writeous coiner exists in a state of bliss until they discover their lexical masterpiece in Google under someone else's name.
by TR Arterburn December 6, 2025
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