Squid Wrangler's definitions
A right-wing blog run by Jesse and John, two psychopaths with a bizarre love for the Bush administration and complete, cess-ridden hatred for the left. One of the main draws of the site is the fact that Jesse is 15 years old and has parents that seemingly don't mind their son publishing slanderous and outright threatening tirades on the internet. His age definitely shines through as his articles are usually rife with spelling and grammar errors while typically sporting an extremely juvenile and immature tone throughout them.
The Jesse Factor usually features baseless and extremely vulgar attacks against liberals and Democrats that often fall apart once further analyzed. In one memorable entry, John claimed that there is much more oil in Alaska than there is in Iraq and as such, oil could not have been among the reasons to spark that particular conflict. A quick visit to the Energy Information Administration website, a branch of the US Department of Energy, proved him to be almost pitifully wrong. Not only that, the number he used to describe the amount of oil in Alaska (16 billion barrels) is the most optimistic one available, frequently contradicted by many experts, and a number often cited by a pro-drilling Alaskan senator alone.
They often do not include sources for their most controversial and damning assertions (stating that the Kerry family bought $500,000 in Halliburton stock, for instance) and usually resort to ad hominem attacks along with homophobic slurs to take up space in their rants. The writing often resembles that of a third-tier Maddox ripoff rather than the biting social and political commentary they were no doubt aiming for.
The Jesse Factor is more or less an extremely annoying variant of what is becoming a run-of-the mill internet presence: crazy assholes who think they know everything publishing their half-coherent drivel for everyone to see.
The Jesse Factor usually features baseless and extremely vulgar attacks against liberals and Democrats that often fall apart once further analyzed. In one memorable entry, John claimed that there is much more oil in Alaska than there is in Iraq and as such, oil could not have been among the reasons to spark that particular conflict. A quick visit to the Energy Information Administration website, a branch of the US Department of Energy, proved him to be almost pitifully wrong. Not only that, the number he used to describe the amount of oil in Alaska (16 billion barrels) is the most optimistic one available, frequently contradicted by many experts, and a number often cited by a pro-drilling Alaskan senator alone.
They often do not include sources for their most controversial and damning assertions (stating that the Kerry family bought $500,000 in Halliburton stock, for instance) and usually resort to ad hominem attacks along with homophobic slurs to take up space in their rants. The writing often resembles that of a third-tier Maddox ripoff rather than the biting social and political commentary they were no doubt aiming for.
The Jesse Factor is more or less an extremely annoying variant of what is becoming a run-of-the mill internet presence: crazy assholes who think they know everything publishing their half-coherent drivel for everyone to see.
"I heard that Jesse of the Jesse Factor is a Libertarian. Well excuse me all to hell for being a Democrat, looks like this kid sides with the real winners."
by Squid Wrangler May 13, 2005
Get the The Jesse Factormug. "And now the liberals want to stop President Reagan from selling chemical warfare agents and military equipment to Saddam Hussein, and why? Because Saddam 'allegedly' gassed a few Kurds in his own country. Mark my words. All of this talk of Saddam Hussein being a 'war criminal' or 'committing crimes against humanity' is the same old thing. LIBERAL HATE SPEECH! And speaking of poison gas ...I SAY WE ROUND UP ALL THE DRUG ADDICTS AND GAS THEM."
-Rush Limbaugh, Nov. 3, 1988
That's all you need to know.
-Rush Limbaugh, Nov. 3, 1988
That's all you need to know.
by Squid Wrangler May 10, 2005
Get the rush limbaughmug. by Squid Wrangler May 8, 2005
Get the lollapaloozamug. Fake, totally unintersesting porn site that has become extremely popular in some bizarre, metaphysical manner. Often credited with single-handedly starting the God-awful trend of "reality" porn sites. Follows the adventures of a handful of bad actors and general wankers employed by porn juggernaut Ox Entertainment. Can typically be seen in and around South Florida paying fat, used-up, coke-shooting skanks $700 to ride around in a van and get reamed by one of the ugly freaks of nature that resides therein. Even then, if you dare conjure up any semblence of an erection, it's usually quelled by a certain wheezing, giggling, cackling, totally obnoxious bastard going by the name of Dirty Sanchez. Very little is known about this mysterious individual, other than the fact that he insists on cracking bad jokes the entire time and seems to get off on random, amateurish zooming and panning. A bunch of equally stupid and low-quality porn sites that feature many of the same girls along with the same lame-brained actors are included as extras for those deluded enough to actually buy a subscription to this shitopia. Even worse than Milf Hunter.
"Hey baby gurrrr hahahahaha wanna like ga hahahaha like come ride with us? Hahahaha, dude, dude, dude!!"
-Dirty Sanchez
-Dirty Sanchez
by Squid Wrangler March 24, 2005
Get the Bang Busmug. Want to see the future? Take any speech about foreign policy Bush made in late 2002/early 2003 and replace "Iraq" with "Iran".
by Squid Wrangler May 14, 2005
Get the Iranmug. Generous old boll-weevil Democrat who praised John Kerry as an "authentic national hero" and said that he was "one of the party's best-known and greatest leaders-and a good friend" as well as asserting that "John has worked to strengthen our military, reform public education, boost the economy and protect the environment" at a dinner in his home state of Georgia in the year 2001. Thanks for the kind words, Zell.
I sure hope Zell Miller never goes on a half-coherent tirade at the Republican National Convention and betrays his own party as well as John Kerry, whom he has referred to as a good friend.
by Squid Wrangler March 28, 2005
Get the zell millermug. Derogatory term used for someone who perennially loses. Is also a political party. Same attributes apply.
Person A: "Dude, you are such a Libertarian"
Person B: "I hate you"
Person A: "I don't support either of those fascists man, I'm voting Libertarian."
Person B: "...Sorry"
Person B: "I hate you"
Person A: "I don't support either of those fascists man, I'm voting Libertarian."
Person B: "...Sorry"
by Squid Wrangler March 26, 2005
Get the Libertarianmug.