Microwave Time

The bs amount of time frozen food says it takes to cook your food

Me: This burrito says it will cook in 1:50, but account for microwave time I'll put it in for two and a half minutes.

by Somewhat Schizo October 13, 2021

Feet Geek

A person who is obsessed with feet.

Me: Mike, I gotta be honest. I'm a feet geek. I love Avril Lavigne.

by Somewhat Schizo April 23, 2023

Double-bitch

When one basketball gets wedgied on the hoop, and so you shoot another ball at it, and happen to somehow make both balls.

Me: Dude, Michael. Did you see Doug the other day? He nailed the elusive double-bitch.
Michael: Damn. Doug is a real hooper.

by Somewhat Schizo September 14, 2021

Lildo

A small marital aide.

Me: Mike, I was at Dougie's sister's place, and I kid you not. This bitch had like 3 lildos on the nightstand. I was out.

Michael: Damn.

by Somewhat Schizo June 17, 2023

Adolt

Someone who is not really an adult, but a grown up child.

Me. Doug, the way you are so immature makes me think you're an adolt.

by Somewhat Schizo July 31, 2023

Absolutly

Drunk on Absolut

Me: You, Doug. I was Absolutly last night.

Doug: I thought you didn't like vodka?

by Somewhat Schizo February 19, 2023

PG&E

A company that ruins lives and kills people and then never pays their due recompense.

Me: Fuck PG&E.
Anyone who has a brain that lives on the West Coast: Yeah. Fuck 'em!

by Somewhat Schizo September 14, 2021