A form of humor involving a twist or joke making the joke seen as offensive, harsh, horrid. Yet the joke is still funny. You need to have pension for dark humor in order to find it truly funny. In a way, it could be seen as the jokes are so horrible in their twist that it makes it funny.
*Hears news about Sandy Hook*
Person 1: God, I can only imagine what was going through those kids heads in the last moments of their lives...
Person 2: Probably bullets
Person 1: OMG!! That's terrible! Can YOU even think of what their parents are going through?!
Person 2: Probably coffin brochures
Person 1: ...
Person 2: It's called dark humor. It's like food. Not everybody gets it.
What one guy says when he walks in on another guy jerking off, making him realize they both secretly want each other. Found in 90's b-movie Boy Band Catalina.
Guy 1 walks in on Guy 2 jerking off in the forest
Guy 1: Oh shit, I'm sorry
Guy 2: Sorry for what? Our daddy taught us not to be ashamed of our dicks, especially since they're such a good size and all.
Guy 1: Yeah, I see that. Your daddy gave you good advice.
Guy 2: It gets bigger when I pull on it.
Guy 1: Hmmmm!
Guy 2: Sometimes, I pull on it so hard, I RIP THE SKIN
Guy 1: Well, my daddy taught me a few things too, like, uh, how not to rip the skin by using someone else's mouth, instead of your own hands.
Guy 2: Will you show me?
Guy 1: I'd be right happy to.
Slang for slang.
Person 1: Yeah you know I think I got the Australian jargon down.
Person 2: Oh, so... slang?
A magical isekai world, where everything as far as the eye can see is made of liquid rubber... in a can! Nothing ever leaks in the Flex World, for the prodigious sealing power of the Flex Seal products prevents leaks from ever existing in reality AND in concept. Jon-kun was brought into the Flex World by the overlord of God, Jesus, Adam, Eve, Lilith, and Allah: Phil Swift. Within the Flex World one can experience endless euphoria among every Flex Seal Product in existence, as well as drive the Flex Glue Monster 4x4 (provided you have your driver's license and proof of insurance.) There is even the greatest invention Phil Swift has ever conceived... but we cannot know of its properties, else our minds would implode from the awe and beauty of its splendor. The only way to enter the Flex World is to be pulled into your TV by Phil Swift himself. It may seem far and attainable, but as a species, we should never stop trying to reach the Flex World and achieve that pure state of nirvana.
Jon Jafari: "Hello? Where am I? Am I dead? Is this heaven?"
Phil Swift: "No Jon. It's not heaven, it's better. It's the Flex World, where everything as far as the eye can see is made of liquid rubber... in a can!"
Something only a Sith deals in.
Anakin: "If you're not with me, then you're my enemy."
Obi-Wan: "Only a Sith deals in absolutes."
Luke: "All woman are queens!"
Kylo Ren: "If she breathes, she's a THOOOOOOOOOOT!"
In the above case, the protagonist and antagonist are clearly Sith.
The union in marriage of two homosexual individuals. It is illegal in many places around the world, including thirteen US states.
8 Reasons to Oppose Gay Marriage:
1. Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.
2. Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behaviour. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.
3. Straight marriage has been around for a long time and hasn't changed at all like many of the principles upon which this great country was founded; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.
4. Straight marriage will be less meaningful is gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of marriages like Britney Spears' would be destroyed.
5. The only valid marriages are those which produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because are orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.
6. Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.
7. Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion here in the United States.
8. Children can never succeed without both a male and female role model at home. That's why we, as a society, expressly forbid single parents to raise children.
A font that all definitions on Urban Dictionary literally just changed to srsly idk why but I guess we’ve just gotta accept it.
Urban dictionary just changed all the font in the definitions to Arial. Looks weird now but eventually we won’t notice