Shumado's definitions

pet husband

A husband who provides constant care and attention to his emotionally needy Amazon wife. This husband is required to constantly attend her and follow her where ever she goes; even when not always appropriate.

"Who's that guy that's been sitting out in the parking lot for 3 hours?"

"Oh, that's Sally's pet husband. He's waiting for her to finish work."

by Shumado April 14, 2013

Co-dependent

Often describing someone who finds all their value as a human being in having a romantic relationship. If they are single, they feel like a total failure and therefore will put up with all kinds of possessive, unhealthy Mr/Ms. Wrongs to bolster their own self worth.

Often seen in high school sweethearts who date all the way through college and into mid-20s. Even though annoyed and bored with each other, they still refuse to break up because they can't stand being single.

Debbie said she always knew Jason wasn't 'the one', but still dated him for 7 years. She's as co-dependent as a barnacle.

by Shumado May 18, 2014

tool

a person who does what everyone else expects them to do. Whatever gets them the most praise or popularity, whether it is good or bad or dumb, they just do it unquestioningly. A person who is being taken advantage of but they just eat it up with a spoon and ask for seconds. Some tools don't understand that they are being used, others do and will complain incessantly about being unfairly treated, while having no intention of doing anything about it.

Jim is always complaining about his horrible miserable job, but he will never take the trouble of looking for a better one. What a tool!

by Shumado December 3, 2013

blue gum

a racial slur for an African American. Connotes a lazy, silly-dumb, manual laborer. Derogatory, but not as derogatory as the "n" word. You'll probably still get beat up if you use it in company.

Those blue gums up the crik eat nothin' but watermelons.

by Shumado April 10, 2015

provincial

describing people who only care about eating, sleeping, making money, and owning crap. Very unimaginative, uncultured people with no concept of the arts, history, language, faith, travel, or why any those things should be valued. Has not visited a library or museum since the 7th grade. Doesn't know the name of a bluebird (really). Like Mr. Banks in Mary Poppins, they "can't see past the end of their nose".

Bell in Beauty and the Beast: "I want much more than this provincial life!"

by Shumado April 14, 2015

Egg Money

Money stashed away for buying little pleasure or home items. Extra side money earned just for fun spending.

I'm using the egg money I earned on the side from ebay to buy the surf board I always wanted.

Farming women would earn "butter and egg money" from their poultry to be used for clothing, shoes, extra treats like white sugar or oranges, and anything store-bought for the home. Men would use crop money to pay the mortgage, or buy livestock or seed for next year.

by Shumado November 5, 2015

he knows which side of his bread is buttered

He knows where the money comes from, who pays him his livelihood or gives him the most personal gain. Used to describe how money concerns often rules people's decisons despite their feelings or personal opinions. No matter what people pander, they will not bite the hand that feeds.

He may gripe about his boss and talk about starting a new career, but he knows which side of his bread is buttered.

Corporate America may not like Trump's sexist statements, but they will still vote for him because after all, they know which side of their bread is buttered.

by Shumado January 8, 2017