Definitions by SaltyKnob

Cloud 

Cloud = Complete Loss of User Data
Cloud computing is where one puts all one's eggs in someone else's basket. This now means that the cloud has you by the balls. The IT people you once employed are now too expensive to call as they have now all become freelance consultants.

Argh! Fucking cloud has gone down and the client can't access any of their data.

Cloud by SaltyKnob September 29, 2020

cluv

Abbreviation of “Cunt Love” as used by millennials, lesbians or morons.

Bro: “Hey sis, what are you up to tonight?”
Sis: “I’m gonna go clubbing to pick up some cluv.

cluv by SaltyKnob December 7, 2018

one-handed stir-fry 

The act of sexual self pleasure utilising one hand. AKA: masturbating.

Dude, what did you do last night?
Nothing but a one-handed stir-fry.
Why?
My girl is still at her parents.

one-handed stir-fry by SaltyKnob March 23, 2017

Beurre noisette 

The mixture of semen and female faeces made during the act of anal sex. The resulting brown mixture looks remarkable like culinary creation beurre noisette but with added funk. AKA: truffle butter

Man 1: Why is that THOT mad with you?
Man 2: I made beurre noisette with her last night.

Beurre noisette by SaltyKnob March 23, 2017

Minge Munchies 

Common HSV or cold sore symptoms on one's face cause by excessive cunnalingus. Embarrassing to you, your woman, your doctor, your family and friends when discovered. AKA: Al Jolson face or reverse Al Jolson face.

Dude 1: Hey what's up with your face?
Dude 2: I went down on that new girl and got a dose of Minge Munchies.
Dude 1: Man, you look like Al Jolson, was she your Mammy?
Dude 2: Uncool, Bro! Uncool!
Dude 1: Was she on ragtime?
Dude 2: Enough!

Minge Munchies by SaltyKnob March 23, 2017