Rollo & Biff's definitions

Sarah Palin

John McCain's VP pick for his disasterous 2008 presidential run is a vicious, bellicose, spiteful, vindictive, homophobic ultra right-wing crackpot who is opposed to abortion rights and stem-cell research, and is in favor of extreme gun-rights, unrestricted drilling for oil, lowering the drinking age and creationism taught in the public schools. Even for a polititian, her ability to look a TV camera straight in the eye while unloading an avalanche of bullshit is astounding. A pathological liar to the max, she makes Richard Nixon look like a choirboy on sodium pentathol. Watch her keep a straight face while referring to herself as a maverick, or when she says that dinosaurs were around 4,000 years ago. To top it all off, she married a guy who said the core American values are "hunting and fishing."

Sarah Palin would make a lousy Vice President, but she would probably give great head.

by Rollo & Biff December 9, 2008

Yodel in the Gulley

(verb) The act of performing cunnilingus. Also
called, "Yodel in the Valley."

LAURA: Now, go brush your teeth, George, and after you get back I'll let you yodel in the gulley.

GEORGE: Duh, whaz a gulley?

by Rollo & Biff April 20, 2006

Sloppy Gonzales

Disgusting but effective bathroom prank. The Sloppy Gonzales is performed by wiping your ass on toilet paper after a particularly messy shit and using it to flush the toilet before disposing of it in the bowl. Also effective on sink faucets as well. A perfect companion piece to the greasy pablo and the upper decker.

As I proceeded to take a wicked shit at the party, some rude guy kept pounding on the door and telling me to "hurry the fuck up," so I left the asshole a Sloppy Gonzales before departing.

by Rollo & Biff January 9, 2008

blowhard

1. A very boastful and talkative person; a braggart

2. A self-important egomaniac who likes to toot his own horn, like those assholes who put bumper stickers on their cars that say "PROUD PARENTS OF AN HONOR STUDENT AT (blah blah blah) HIGH SCHOOL"

"Did you catch the State of the Union speech last night? What a fucking blowhard!"

by Rollo & Biff May 30, 2006

Santorum

1: A foul-smelling, frothy mixture of fecal matter and semen that dribbles from a male partner's raw, tumescent anus after sodomy and dribbles down his testicles like so much chocolate syrup and mayonnaise.

2: Biting, pejorative term used to describe a plutocratic, homophobic theocrat; a component of the radical right who embraces tax cuts for the rich, social spending cuts for the poor, anti-gay legislation in every concievable form and adherence to the strictest tenets of the Christian right.

3. Last name of U.S. Senator from Pennsylvania who former Nebraska Senator Bob Kerry likened to the innermost part of the posterior and who President shit-for-brains referred to as "inclusive."

Upon entering the darkened room, I noticed Reverend Falwell's eyes rolling wildly in his head, his gentle whimpers undulating in response to the savage pounding his prostate was undergoing. Then, all at once, he let out a long, melodic sigh and began to gently cry. It was all he could do after taking it in the ass by Rick Santorum.

by Rollo & Biff October 26, 2006

Coulteresque

Having the quality of a politically reactionary idea, statement or principle, used expressely for the purpose of alienating those whose positions are contrary to the neocon idiot espousing them. Coulteresque statements are inflammatory and/or hateful by nature, and are usually directed at intelligent people whose political views are inconsistent with those of ultra right-wing author and crackpot commentator Ann Coulter and those of her ilk.

As I sat in the redneck bar, my ears were assaulted by one Coulteresque statement after another as two drunken neocon idiots demonstrated their ignorance of politics to the other patrons.

by Rollo & Biff August 1, 2007

$tarbuck$

A Posh, upscale, trendy, pretentious coffee shop franchaise hell-bent on putting their more sincere competitors (like Dunkin' Donuts) out of business with their "designer" coffee, mocha java and latte blends that are merely an ultra-sweetened and enriched concoction of Maxwell House, liquid shit and rat semen. They are mostly frequented by snotty, cardigan-wearing yuppie cocksuckers, corporate scumbags in three-piece suits and mindless working class drones who think paying $4.00 for a cup of coffee makes them successful and important.

FIREMAN: Oh, sir...sir! The World Trade Center has just collapsed and many survivors need help! Do you have any water you can spare?
$TARBUCK$ VENDOR: Sure. I have some bottled water over here you can have... for 300 bucks a bottle! Heh heh heh!
FIREMAN: You heartless slug... fuck you!

by Rollo & Biff October 30, 2006