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Rifleman59's definitions

One Can Van Damme

A person who, after a minimal ammount of alcohol, turns into the legendary belgian muscle man jean Claude Van Damme and starts a fight with anybody near him despite their size
Things got a bit tasty last night in the Club - after half a pint of special brew Dave turned into One Can Van Damme and smacked a bouncer
by Rifleman59 April 30, 2010
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Beef Bugle

Blow job - when the knob is held with one hand and gingerly sucked on the tip so it looks as if it is being played instead of sucked
Goodnight love.....before you go to sleep do you fancy playing the last post on my beef bugle......you do!!!, wank durch.
by Rifleman59 May 7, 2010
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Diamond Cutter

Diamond Cutter - an erection so hard that it could polish a diamond
Jeez, here comes suzzanne from the typing pool - Ive got a diamond cutter , its so hard you could engrave a pewter goblet with it
by Rifleman59 April 29, 2010
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Wank Sock

An old sock, kept under the pillow or bed for the sole purpose of catching any seed spilled when taking a Riflemans Sleeping Tablet
Do you need any tissues for tonight son?....no thanks mum I've got my wank sock under my bed.....thanks anyway....wank durch
by Rifleman59 May 5, 2010
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In off the pink

When , during and particularly energetic bout of sexual intercourse, you withdraw the knob a little too far and when attempting to re-enter the otters pocket it is deflected into the chocolate speedway
Fiona threw her head back and howled like a banshee....'What the fuck was that...?' she screamed, 'Sorry love, must have gone 'in off the pink'..I suppose a blow is out of the question...?'.wank durch
by Rifleman59 May 19, 2010
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Durch

Royal Green Jacket/Rifles slang meaning whatever I have just said I mean to total opposite
Morning love........ your looking slim durch
by Rifleman59 April 30, 2010
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Near Miss Porn Stomach

That intense sick feeling you get when you are pulling your meat and you hear the front door close and you scramble to disconnect from 'up my arse' dot com as quickly as you can whilst pulling up your trousers and wiping jizz off the keyboard
Fuck me...I was waxing the dolphin yesterday when my Grandad came home early from the day centre....I had near miss porn stomach for fucking hours afterwards
by Rifleman59 May 5, 2010
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