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Real Gangsta in da House's definitions

Stockport

A place in England that doesn't contain enough townies. There are only 500,000 neds in Stockport yet I think I saw a grunger once. What if they round themselves up and attempt to outnumber us. I am a chav and without at least 20 townies surrounding me constantly I get scared.

Stockport is full of places fo' us Gs to hang 5 innit such as the cinema to see some light entertainment such as the latest xXx movie. There are benches outside of the local 5 star resturant McDonalds where one can spit as much as he chooses. In fact, there are three McDs. Truely a luxurius choice of a home town and a highly cultured society. Such as the local musical art theater, HMV, that plays exquisite rap classics. Beautiful paintings can be around the many monuments in which artists express themselves with spraypaint with such poetry as "I fucked Jen at this spot".

Has one of the only town centres smart enough not to ban hoodies (After all, they would lose ALL their customers, literally.)
Stockport is a high class, cultured society so we try not to let any riff-raff like you punks or working class jazz fags get in our way.
by Real Gangsta in da House July 31, 2005
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Black Album

The name that many artists and bands have decided to name their album. Some of the artists to have given one of their albums this title are:
Jay-Z
Prince
The Damned
Boyd Rice
Metallica fans also refer to their self entitled album as the Black Album due to its nameless cover and to symbolise the beginning of the end.

Ira Peel hasn't looked at the Music Fan Reaction List. A Metallica fan wouldn't cry because someone insulted their favourite album with such a poor insult.

BTW The Metallica album wasn't called 'The Black Album' so Jay-Z didn't steal it. You're thinking of his beats.

I am using this definition to hurl abuse at everyone else that has posted whether than describe the term. I am just like everyone else on this site. I'm cool for once unlike school!
Punk: Will scream and violently attack everything nearby except people.
Rap: If act tough and attempt to defend their music with crap like 'Yo is just jealous as ya not gangsta lie us nigga'
Metal: Will violently assualt the blastfermor.
Classical: Will state you as being an uncultured yob.
Emo: Will run home and cry about it in their mother's arms.
Goth: Will run home and cut themselves
Hippie: Who cares? It's all cool man.
by Real Gangsta in da House July 31, 2005
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Death Metal

"RRRAWWWWWRRRRGGGGGG!KILL!RAAAWWWWRRRRGGGG"
Scream that above line 85 times in a gruntish voice while smacking your fists randomly against the desk. Congratulations. You have now heard every Death Metal song in existence. If you are a filthy, self loathing goths who doesn't wear sports gear, only then will you 'pretend' to like this attempt at poetry. Even the so called 'fans' don't like this. They only pretend they do so they can be different but all goths are the same, they all wear makeup (Even the men which means they must be beaten up for not being heterosexual like god intended!)

Slipknot, Korn and Marilyn Manson are three of the heaviest Death Metal bands. I heard them once and my ears nearly exploded. The noise in the background are created by 'guitars' and 'drums'. There isn't a single DJ mixing a beat or any lyrics about banging ya ho. It's all "DIE, DIE DIE, I HATE MYSELF! I am goth, grrr, I worship Satan and hate God even though he created me just like my parents who I also hate." You don't hear Eminem whining like that do you?

Rock and Metal are a wasteland of yobs pulling strings on wooden blocks and bashing trashcans in a vain attempt to create art. Anyone can become a vulgar rockstar. Chingy is too good for instruments and instead used his beautiful flow to tell a story from the streets. Chingy doesn't scream because he isn't angry even though he lived on the streets and those rich, white lads just didn't get their $500 allowance one week because they crashed their dad's BMW.

My friend is an idiot, he thinks bands exist outside of MTV yet MTV plays all the music variety in the world so I know he is a liar and I hit him for being a goth. I hate goths. All goth music sucks and anyone that listens to it must die! I'll stick with Nelly, 50 cent and Bauhaus instead of your screaming, self loathing, hatefilled, racist, homophobic, faggot, goth crap.
The only good heavy metal band is Limp Bizkit. Death Metal like Slipknot sucks because it isn't rap. I bet you idiots like classical too like all the other goth idiots at my school. I bet you're going to go to...ha ha...college *smirk* for even more education. I'm nearly out of school! I don't want more education! I'm getting a job at McDonalds. I know that has nothing to do with defining Death Metal but most people here don't define the term and just argue and being a rap fan I do what is cool because I know what is 'in' and goth music is so 'out'.
by Real Gangsta in da House July 29, 2005
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Children of Elohim

A Gangsta Christian Death Metal band from Minnesota. For a Christian band, they don't totally suck. Formed in 1995, they released their first album "Lucifer is Dead", a 180 turn on the quote God is Dead. They sing (or more accurately, scream) about how great god is and also themes involving the mutiliation of white children, gang rape and other gangsta/gore themes.

Some members of both the metal and the black community are horrified by their hypocritical attitudes. One second commenting on how bad racism is and then the next blaming the death on Jesus on the Jewish people. However, this is merely their opinion and they shoud be able to express it without fear of persercution.

The name itself is a play on the name of popular metal band 'Children of Bodom' whom this band has considered to represent all that is wrong with our society and a bad influence on our youth. The name is representing that we are really god's children and he loves most of us "except Jews"

Myself, I find their lyrics too hypocritical to listen to often. However, the legendary guitar solos by the greatest female guitarist of all time, Sister Destruction. She's damn hot too. If you want some kick ass riffs and amazing duet gauitar solos, check out this band.

Line-Up
Father Destruction - Vocals
Sister Murder - Guitar #1
Father Skinless - Guitar #2
Father Hatred - Drum
Dead Child of the Alter - Bassist
Rotting Jesus - Violin
"God is in all creatures, black or white / Why must we hate and fight / Satan laughs as we kill our kind / Fuck that bitch with a dildo in da ass / Replace ya hate with love in god / He loves us back and purifies our heart."

"The KKK give us too much stick / those people are full of shit / They learn where problems lie / Who should live and who should die / How can hope leave us / It's cause the world is full of Jews / The Jews killed Jesus / Now we're killing yoooouuuuu"
by Real Gangsta in da House August 5, 2005
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Classical

Considered a type of music however unlike music it doesn't involve computer generated beats and even more shockingly, no lyrics about bustin' a whitey's ass with lead!

Classical music has no true emotion behind it. True lyricists like Nelly speak from the heart. Classical doesn't have any lyrics so you don't know what they were thinking when they wrote that filth.

The majority of listeners are old people who refuse to move on because if they heard how good new music was compared to this dribble they would kill themselves because it would undoubtably prove we live in the greatest generation. Classical Music is so old, it was made when John Lennon wasn't a corpse (I know that he is a rock loser but they were all invented at the creation of the universe.)

Everybody knows that Mozart only got famous when he started beefing with the Beethoven man. During their sets, they would get semi-naked girls to dance around on the piano unlike the true artists of today who let their beautiful masterpieces speak for themselves.

Anyone can make classical music.
1: Think of some random notes (Not even beats!)
2: Repeat step 1 six times
3: Invite 25 of ya gang around
4: Give them a violin or trombone or something else (NOT a turntable to be seen!)
5: Give each person a different sheet with random notes
6: Record the result
7: Get some director who is old to play it during their movie.

8 Mile is the best movie ever made and that ended with 'Lose Yourself'. No Classical in that. Only REAL music.

The reason classical is only played during movies nowadays is because:
1: If they played rap, people would focus more on the wicked beats than the plot.
2: All directors are older than 30 because they lived when dinosaurs ate people but unfortunely they lived.
3: Rap artists like 50 cent have too much dignity to let their art be given to shitty films like 'Civtizen Cane'

Classical only used to be popular because it was 'cool' at the time and true music like rap wasn't invented yet.
Emotional music comes from the heart, not from fucking black dots written on a paper with lines.

Classical is boring. When is the last time you saw classical music on MTV or at no.1 in the charts? I rest my case.
NOT music: Ludwig Van Beethoven
Music: 50 cent, Chingy, Nelly, Ludacris, Ja Rule, The Game (Not so much now, since 50 cent is the best and 50 cent hates The Game, that means he sucks, even the old stuff is now crap)
by Real Gangsta in da House July 29, 2005
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MTV Rocks

MTV is the only thing we true music fans have left nowadays. Music however is being destroyed by 'posers' (A word I don't understand the meaning of but I like to use to insult people I don't like.) I was in a chatroom with my mate, Dave, talking about how wicked that new Chingy video was , yeah. Then this twat told us to get off the Classical music forum and go on the rap forum. I told that fucker straight
"Rap is classic and will always be remembered as the greatest music ever!"
He then asked if I have heard any other genres of music and I said
"No, I'm not a filthy gawth so I only listen to rap music."
He then said that if I was a true music fan I would look into all forms of music before making such a rash judgement, and get this, the cheeky twat even said that other forms of music exists outside of MTV. Of course I said
"If it isn't on MTV, it must be shit because no one likes it" and then he said that MTV was ruining music. MTV IS MUSIC. That is like saying Tony Blair is ruining England. Whoever this 'Jimi Hendrix' and this 'Pink Flyod' chap was, they both must have been shit rappers because I have never seen them on MTV. If you want music, please watch MTV. The rappers on their are creating art. Shit like Mozart only wanted the money so they just vomited out any old bollocks.
MTV is the greatest creation ever to ever be, ever.
by Real Gangsta in da House July 31, 2005
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Opera

A form of 'non-music' theater. Music wasn't invented until 1980 odd with the creation of rap.

Women weren't allowed on stage during Shakesphere times which is when most old people today came from. So all the women in bikinis, riding in the cars in each opera'like you see on MTV were really men! Which means non-heterosexuals enjoy this.

Those creatures on strange pierce the ears of anyone apart from the deaf old people that listen to this. Only old people like opera and all old people are deaf. Coincidence? If they had rap to listen to when they were younger, maybe they would be living normal lives pinpim' thier rides and hoes and shooting one another. Instead of watching castrated gay men. The tennors sing (NOT rap!?!?!) at a high pitched voice which means they are gay and thus disobeying the word of god and therefore it is your duty of moral Catholics to burn them using sticks of fire.

Opera can be distingused by it's lack of turntables, abense of flow and non-gangsta style lyrics. Opera also consisted of very few black people because everyone was racist back then and all the black 'singers' weren't allowed to wear the same pretty hats as the white scum we allow to share our air.

Most Opera tells a FAKE story because it is all a staged play unlike Vanilla Ice who speaks from the street and from the heart. The story is written by an old person that doesn't even know what 'shiznit' means (Yes, some people are that uneducateded.)

This is every Opera song.
"AAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"
That isn't rap! That's just noise! To all you old people who were born before 1970 and saw the big bang happening. Get some real music like Nelly and forget this so-called 'musicial theater' ever existed. Theater is for old, wrinkled art people anyway who don't like girls. Do rappers do theater? No, they do movies because everybody likes 'Cradle 2 the Grave" except my mother but she is dead now.
Opera Fan: @MG! 1 l0\/3 0p3R@. T|-|3rE i5 |\|o R@pP1nG 1|\| 17!
Music Fan: Have you heard of Ludacris?
Opera Fan: ...33rr..y35, h3 15 @ r4....
Music Fan: HA! You haven't even heard of Ludacris! You are such a noob! I bet your a virgin just like you're birth mother!
by Real Gangsta in da House July 29, 2005
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