Maybe if da infamous teen-aged repeat offender who was sentenced to suffering through hearing his mom sing "America The Beautiful" on da court karaoke ("because jail is too good for you, and has previously been ineffective in curtailing your irresponsible behavior") had instead merely been compelled to listen to said patriotic song's melody on a laptop, said less-painful penalty might have been somewhat of a midigation of da distress dat said juvenile delinquent would have otherwise felt at having been caught and sentenced yet again.
by QuacksO August 23, 2022
If you're comfy with interracial marriage and would like to have a wife named Barbara, there are plenty of chocolate-complexioned cuties with that name on the Barbaray Coast who are currently "looking".
by QuacksO October 06, 2018
The street-name, house-number, etc. where mail could reach Honest Abe while he was staying in Gettysburg.
Dunno why some students find it so difficult to to memorize Lincoln's Gettysburg address --- it was only three short lines:
President Abraham Lincoln
128 Broadway
Gettysburg, PA 17325
President Abraham Lincoln
128 Broadway
Gettysburg, PA 17325
by QuacksO October 11, 2018
AFTER thoroughly reading the instruction manual, of course, to see if that might help you to get it to work properly without resorting to such drastic measures :D
Seasoned mechanic, talking to an elderly long-retired grease-monkey buddy on the phone: I have a '58 Ford 350 two-ton flatbed here with a frozen rear brake-drum --- I've tried WD-40, I've tried penetrating-oil, I've banged on it with a two-pound sledge, and then even a five-pound sledge, but it still refuses to budge... any ideas?
Aged grease-monkey: Yes, indeed, Son --- get an eight-pounder and really have at it.
Seasoned mechanic, in plaintive shock: But... but... I'll BREAK it if I do THAT!
Aged grease-monkey, confidently: No, you won't --- trust me --- those beefy old solid-iron brakes are made extra-tough, specifically to safely withstand the extra force of being overhauled like this. Just get up your nerve and really clobber on it!
Mechanic, hesitantly: Okaayyy... if you say so... hold the line... gets a huge sledge hammer and reluctantly but resolutely bashes the ancient brake drum, then steps back in wide-eyed surprise when the ponderous hammer just harmlessly bounces off; emboldened, he rears back and really takes a mighty swing at the drum again, knocking the drum loose and sending it flying halfway across the shop. He picks it up and is flabbergasted to see that it is still fully intact, and with only a very minor surface-scuffing. So he lifts the phone again in pleased bewilderment Wow --- you were right... it came off with just two whacks, and I didn't damage it at all!
Aged mechanic: See? Tolja it would be okay... when all else fails, get a bigger hammer!
Aged grease-monkey: Yes, indeed, Son --- get an eight-pounder and really have at it.
Seasoned mechanic, in plaintive shock: But... but... I'll BREAK it if I do THAT!
Aged grease-monkey, confidently: No, you won't --- trust me --- those beefy old solid-iron brakes are made extra-tough, specifically to safely withstand the extra force of being overhauled like this. Just get up your nerve and really clobber on it!
Mechanic, hesitantly: Okaayyy... if you say so... hold the line... gets a huge sledge hammer and reluctantly but resolutely bashes the ancient brake drum, then steps back in wide-eyed surprise when the ponderous hammer just harmlessly bounces off; emboldened, he rears back and really takes a mighty swing at the drum again, knocking the drum loose and sending it flying halfway across the shop. He picks it up and is flabbergasted to see that it is still fully intact, and with only a very minor surface-scuffing. So he lifts the phone again in pleased bewilderment Wow --- you were right... it came off with just two whacks, and I didn't damage it at all!
Aged mechanic: See? Tolja it would be okay... when all else fails, get a bigger hammer!
by QuacksO February 13, 2017
For years I had an elderly neighbor named Phyllis who was a real "political rebel" with lots of determination to assist others, so perhaps she was a descendant of the Phyllistines.
by QuacksO May 22, 2019
A mooching family-member who uses reverse-nepotism (i.e., instead of Person A's extending undeserved favors to Person B just because Person B is related to him, Person B pressures Person A to excessively favor him due to family ties) in an attempt to get you to purchase non-vital items for him.
Ethan Couch's parents were way too indulgent of him financially, and so he became a totally spoiled brat who expected ALL fellow humans to cater to his wishes, whether they were his buyological relatives or not.
by QuacksO November 15, 2020
In da music video, "Prop Me Up Beside The Jukebox If I Die", singer Joe Diffie naively treats da motionless-and-unresponsive bar-patron as if he's merely in aleing health ("It's closing time, Buddy --- you don't hafta go home, but you can't stay here."), not realizing dat he's actually a deceased corpse who's been brought there for his "final hurrah" in da raucous live-and-recorded-music-offering-and-liquor-serving-establishment-hopping lifestyle.
by QuacksO June 23, 2023