10 definitions by PortableBacon
"This product seems good. It's got a perfect 5 stars, might as well buy it now. Also, did you see this latest counterfeit scam?"
"All those reviewers have only one review on their profile and it's only for that product. Also, that article is from a satire website. Learn to fakespot."
"All those reviewers have only one review on their profile and it's only for that product. Also, that article is from a satire website. Learn to fakespot."
by PortableBacon August 8, 2016
When people play the victim card and bend over backwards to be as offended as possible when they really aren't. Using hissy fits, political correctness, character assassination, and a false sense of moral authority, the outrager hopes to gain power and public recognition for their brave act of justice as well as a sense of control over their meaningless existence. Often accompanied by demands for financial compensation for their "pain and suffering".
"Why do we have warning labels that say 'Contains peanuts' on peanut jars and 'Contains milk' on milk cartons? Can't we just go back to using common sense instead of having to litigate everything in fear of lawsuits?"
"We only have the outrage culture to blame."
"We only have the outrage culture to blame."
by PortableBacon September 30, 2014
A poor and thinly veiled attempt by internet service providers to keep costs down and limit services by blaming users for using "too much bandwidth", despite receiving billions in government subsidies meant to expand and improve national internet infrastructure, but which were instead maliciously pocketed by internet service executives.
Customer: "How the fuck am I over my monthly data cap?"
Internet Service Representative "If you would just look right here in the contract you signed, we can arbitrarily fuck you over by making up whatever numbers we want. And we don't care if we get caught because whatever penalties we pay is a tiny fraction of the profit we make from our illegal schemes."
Internet Service Representative "If you would just look right here in the contract you signed, we can arbitrarily fuck you over by making up whatever numbers we want. And we don't care if we get caught because whatever penalties we pay is a tiny fraction of the profit we make from our illegal schemes."
by PortableBacon June 23, 2019
"No one has any money left and everything costs too much. Watch out for scams and keep to yourself."
"Too late. I helped some old boomer pick up her groceries and she accused me of damaging them. She demanded I pay for them or she would call the police. What has our country become? It hasn't just gone adrift, it's gone agrift."
"Too late. I helped some old boomer pick up her groceries and she accused me of damaging them. She demanded I pay for them or she would call the police. What has our country become? It hasn't just gone adrift, it's gone agrift."
by PortableBacon April 30, 2022
A person who discounts or ignores societal or environmental problems because they believe that intelligence and technological prowess make humanity exempt from the natural processes that govern other species.
Also, a person who defers accountability to others.
Also, a person who defers accountability to others.
Exemptionalist: The earth, environment, and all life are disposable in the wake of humanity. Population growth? Good for the economy. Species going extinct? Not to worry. That is nature's way. Think of humankind as only the latest in a long line of exterminating agents in geological time. Besides, if we have to destroy a rainforest, we are smart enough to place another one somewhere else. If we have to witness the extinction of a species, we are smart enough to create breeding programs. Resources? The planet has more than enough resources to last indefinitely. It always has and it always will. The fact that industrialization is destroying environments faster than anything humanity has ever seen doesn't change this fact. Don't worry. Be happy!
Environmentalist: The fate of mankind is closely knit to the well-being of biodiversity and the environment. Food is becoming more and more scarce and will worsen when the melting ice caps and rising ocean levels decrease arable land. We exhaust resources at a much faster rate than they can be replenished. We cause the extinction of species faster than they can be created. Destruction or degradation of biodiversity is irreplaceable because there is so much intricacy that we still don’t know. Millions of plants and animals die with deforestation that, unknowingly, may have been life-saving for humanity. Humanity must work to save the planet, and in doing so we save ourselves.
Environmentalist: The fate of mankind is closely knit to the well-being of biodiversity and the environment. Food is becoming more and more scarce and will worsen when the melting ice caps and rising ocean levels decrease arable land. We exhaust resources at a much faster rate than they can be replenished. We cause the extinction of species faster than they can be created. Destruction or degradation of biodiversity is irreplaceable because there is so much intricacy that we still don’t know. Millions of plants and animals die with deforestation that, unknowingly, may have been life-saving for humanity. Humanity must work to save the planet, and in doing so we save ourselves.
by PortableBacon June 4, 2010
Tentacle porn where the victim or victims are willing participants, thus giving consent for sexual intercourse with said tentacles
Tentacle porn is great, but consentacles are the best!
I wouldn't mind having some hot consentacle sex right now.
I wouldn't mind having some hot consentacle sex right now.
by PortableBacon June 1, 2010
krashmo: Wow.. I haven't laughed that hard in a while. It made my reddit poop quite a bit more interesting.
by PortableBacon January 14, 2012