Clickety-clack

Just another word for clickety clackety; that is making noise through typing on a computer keyboard.
Darren: Two tickets to Denver, Colorado please!
Norah (Flight Agent): *clickety-clack*. No problem sir. I found a flight. You're all booked!

* * *

Kelly: Could you please find out how many PTOs I have left this year?
Katherine (H.R. Agent): Sure thing! *clickety-clack* It says here you got one week left.

* * *

Jason: *clickety-clack* The Sword of Shannara! That's the first book in the Shannara series.
Laura: What about the author's other series about the lawyer who becomes a king?
Jason: *clickety-clack* The Magic Kingdom of Landover. Here, take the keyboard. The library search engine is quite easy to use. What is yet another series by that same author?
Laura: *clickety-clack* The Word and the Void.
by OffBeatDrummer November 23, 2020
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Baseball Bat Treatment

Getting beat up by a baseball bat.

This is the warm weather version of the Hockey Stick Treatment.
Joey: Guess what happened today at the grocery shop where I work! I caught someone stealing!!
Xavier: Did he go to jail?
Joey: No, he got the baseball bat treatment!
by OffBeatDrummer September 26, 2023
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Covidiot

Idiots who think Covid is a real threat and idiotically cover their face with a mask fearfully.
David: I just got back from the 5k run.
Joan: How was it?
David: Filled with covidiots! Everybody had a mask on. It was terrible!
Joan: Tell me about it!

Scott: What's your 20?
Rick: 10-8
Scott: I am spotting a large swath of covidiots protesting in a rally. I request backup immediately.

Laura: Why are you covering your face!?!! Do you have a large pimple or something?
Monica: No, haven't you heard of covid? I'm protecting myself from germs and viruses.
Laura: You realize you are protecting me not yourself by wearing a mask right?!! Covidiot!
by OffBeatDrummer November 13, 2020
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Befaggotted

Something or someone completely ruined with faggotry.
Billy: So, I visit this new social media website claiming to be all about free speech, and the next thing you know, I am reported for saying Trump Americans are better than others. What's wrong with them!?! Are they too weak to hear the truth!?! And, here's the kicker! I ask the admins why I was reported, and they respond; it's because I said something that hurt someone's feelings. What's wrong with them!?! Just deny the report and say it's because "We defend free speech!" It's that simple!
Jeff: Must be one of those Gen Y websites. This generation is completely befaggotted. Even if you say Hi to them, they get offended.

Carl: I went to this club Hooligans we used to dance at when we were in college.
Mark: Oh yeah!? Saw any hot chics there?
Carl: Not exactly. I saw a dude acting like other dudes were women. I don't know whatever happened to that club! It's become befaggotted!
Mark: Must be one of those stupid policies about welcoming everyone regardless of rape inclinations (aka "sexual orientations").
by OffBeatDrummer November 14, 2020
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BIFI

BIFI: By Idiots For Idiots

Pronounced as “beefy“
Lisa: Quick! Give me some websites that are BIFI
Marie: Quora, Reddit, Twitter, Facebook, and Wikipedia!
Lisa: Thanks. The Dark Web hacker launch codes have been activated. They’ll be end of lifed in no time.
by OffBeatDrummer February 03, 2021
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Idiots Unite

A group of idiots who all seem so similarly idiotic it almost feels like they're part of a club.
Aaron: "Sell! Sell! Sell!" says the Mad Money dude. Do you buy that!? Everyone is listening to him blindly. I don't get it.
Oliver: People bought his line about the market bubble. Idiots Unite!

Jared: Well, if it isn't the smart and talented Charlotte?!?!
Charlotte: What's up Jared?!
Jared: I saw a whole bunch of people following you after class yesterday. What happened!?
Charlotte: I told the instructor I missed the exam because I found out I was pregnant. People kept bugging me afterwards about who the father was. Idiots Unite! Hello!!! It's my new husband Baldwin, who else might it be!?!!

Sophia: Skiing in the summer?! Who does that!!!?
Scarlett: Apparently, Lisa and company. They haven't had enough skiing in the winter it seems.
Sophia: Oh wow! Didn't they go every weekend!!? I mean, I go three times a year and that's more than enough. In the summer, it's beach time baby!
Scarlett: I'm with you, summer means sunbathing on the beach every single day! Let's just leave it at Idiots Unite! Lisa and her friends seem to really dig summer skiing instead. Their loss.
by OffBeatDrummer November 25, 2020
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Faggot Tree

Tom: Gee, how do you pronounce this word? (pointing at "faggotry")
Caleb: Just think of the two words: Faggot Tree
by OffBeatDrummer December 11, 2020
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