Noble Webster's definitions

Freemasonry

A fraternity having more than 6 million members worldwide and claiming origins as far back as the time of the Old Testament, though this has not been proven. However, since the Masonic brotherhood places so strong an emphasis on secrecy, this has lead to centuries of idle speculation concerning the Brotherhood, most of it negative. However, once a man becomes a Mason he discovers that the secrecy of Freemasonry has only one function: to teach the lesson of maintaining trust and confidentiality, both of which are qualities Masons and Non-Masons alike seek in their closest friendships.

freemasonry, fraternity, secrecy

by Noble Webster February 5, 2010

Whale

A big fucking thing in the water. Not to be confused with oil tanker.

The whale ate him with horrible teeth of pain.

by Noble Webster February 5, 2010

Dictionary

You're holding it, you moron. See MORON.

He looked up "dictionary" in a dictionary, so I assumed he was a moron.

by Noble Webster February 5, 2010

Oil tanker

A big fucking thing in the water. Not to be confused with whale. SEE Whale.

The oil tanker pulled into the harbor at Galveston, assuring a good healthy dose of American capitalist supremacy. Oil. It's what's for dinner.

by Noble Webster February 5, 2010

absurdity

Any belief or opinion that disagrees with one's own.

Global warming is a complete absurdity.

by Noble Webster February 5, 2010

vegan

Someone who eats neither meat nor dairy. Usually accompanied by extreme liberalism, environmental activism, bisexual tendencies, and tolerance to the point of being unable to tolerate any belief or opinion that isn't left-wing kook-fringe nonsense.

She was a vegan, so he didn't bother asking her out on a date. He merely gave her a tofu sausage and walked away to the sounds of her moaning in what normal people could only vaguely assume was sexual pleasure.

by Noble Webster February 5, 2010

Sheeple

Referring to anyone who merely follows the party line, devoid of any semblance of critical thinking or analysis, merely because they believe it will get them laid frequently at smarmy left-wing parties featuring tofu and pictures of Barack Obama.

They were all sheeple because they believed Obama was always right and always loved them because he was black and they felt guilty.

by Noble Webster February 5, 2010