That special waitress who approaches your table - clearly wishing you would die during her shift - and asks "How is everything?"
by Monkey's Dad February 28, 2023
By the year 2050, the sole remaining word in spoken English - a language once said to comprise 171,476 words, in a mode of communication once ubiquitous, then common, then, like, whatever. It was deemed, like, for real? and finally supplanted by enthusiastically written English, ie: texted abbreviations and emojis.
He was, like, 2050? and I'm like, what? and he went, like, the, like, single, like, remaining word in, like, whoa, and I'm, like, whatever
by Monkey's Dad October 13, 2019
The lyrics to his song "Her Town Too" have taken on a new edge in the age of coronavirus:
"She's been afraid to go out
She's afraid of the knock on her door"
"She's been afraid to go out
She's afraid of the knock on her door"
Lying in bed, fearful of leaving her apartment, waiting for a stranger to deliver her dinner, the song came up.
'It's the James Taylor Prophecy', she thought, 'I'm afraid to go out, I'm afraid of the knock on my door, always a shade of a doubt, I can never be sure, who comes to call. Maybe the friend of a friend of a friend. Anyone at all. Anything but nothing again.'
'It's the James Taylor Prophecy', she thought, 'I'm afraid to go out, I'm afraid of the knock on my door, always a shade of a doubt, I can never be sure, who comes to call. Maybe the friend of a friend of a friend. Anyone at all. Anything but nothing again.'
by Monkey's Dad March 28, 2020
In "Cinderella", a ridiculous mis-translation from the French. The original story, handed down orally, centered around "Vair" slippers, vair being squirrel fur. But "vair" sounds like "verre", the French word for glass, and so it continued. Fur slippers make perfect sense. But glass??
Cinderella felt sorry for the handsome prince, kneeling before her. She wondered what kind of idiot expected her to take two steps in glass slippers, when the beloved pair she had lost were made of fur. "I mean, glass shoes? Really?"
by Monkey's Dad March 01, 2020
An unintentional distortion of the phrase "spreading like wildfire", which, oddly, is both poetically evocative and accurate in its imagery.
Anne would often say, of a rumor, a fashion or a craze, "it's spreading like wildflower", and he was too impressed by its inner truth and charm to ever correct her.
by Monkey's Dad June 13, 2021
Psychological-Science-Fiction.
A dominant movie genre, when movies get made again, looking back at the meltdown of human life on earth in 2020.
A dominant movie genre, when movies get made again, looking back at the meltdown of human life on earth in 2020.
"It's classic Sci-Psy. Totally. One guy, he's a shrink. With a gun. Alone in New York! Humans are afraid to breathe, afraid of each other, dying by the millions! A fucking game show host is stoking race war, there's nobody in charge, everyone is going insane and pretending to be ok! The one lone guy has two days to save the planet. It's called "How Does That Make You Feel?"
by Monkey's Dad July 03, 2020
Imagining the empty stadium, the canceled opening game, he heard the Scar Spangled Banner, sung in a silent voice.
by Monkey's Dad March 25, 2020