Matti! Matti! Matti!'s definitions

Ugly Day

A day on which all the people one meets are unattractive, despite the odds which say that half the people one meets will be attractive.

You're lucky you stayed home: it was Ugly Day at the gym today!

by Matti! Matti! Matti! November 22, 2010

Orphan's Christmas

A standard Christmas celebration held by people who aren't able to be with their birth families because they are overseas or have a difficult relationship with their family.

Often used by people who have been disowned by their parents, such as homosexuals who have escaped their conservative, small-town upbringing and moved to the more open-minded city.

"Tell everyone there's an Orphan's Christmas at mine this year. Bring a plate and the booze is on me!"

by Matti! Matti! Matti! November 25, 2011

woman

Female. Instead of being used as a noun (A woman with red hair) it has become and adjective, used as "lady" once was (A lady doctor).

Julia Gillard is Australia's first woman Prime Minister.

by Matti! Matti! Matti! January 20, 2011

no-boner

A woman/gay man who is sexually off-limits. The restriction is self-imposed.

Includes victims of trauma (eg was recently assaulted), sexually transmissable infection, bro rules (eg your bro's sister but you can't contact him to get permission), psychopathy (eg "sex-is-love" disorder).

From the word form "no-brainer"

Bambi was looking totally hot last night but she was on her rags so it was a total no-boner.

by Matti! Matti! Matti! January 4, 2011

Go

Become.

A change from the active to the passive.

Dinosaurs went extinct millions of years ago." instead of "Dinosaurs became extinct millions of years ago.

by Matti! Matti! Matti! December 7, 2011

circumsuction

To stand in one place while vacuuming in a circle around you.

Some people like to vacuum in straight lines but I prefer to circumsuction.

by Matti! Matti! Matti! November 9, 2010

Department of Clipboards

An alternative collective noun for a shuffle of bureaucrats, specifically those with some sort of auditing task. Inspired by their flocking behaviour and use of clipboards as a work tool. Derogatory.

"Better sort out those paperclips, Bob; the Department of Clipboards is just getting out of the lift."

by Matti! Matti! Matti! October 13, 2012