Wiseacre

That Emmet Wickersham is a real wiseacre, I tell you. I caught him stealing checkers off the board while I was looking at Lawrence Welk on the television set." "If he tries that just one more time, I'm calling the nurse."
by Markwonder August 30, 2010
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Slavery

An institution supported and perpetuated by the Democratic Party right before the civil war. It's true. Look it up.

When Republican Abraham Lincoln became President during the election of 1860 on a platform of ending slavery in the US, many of the slave owning southern Democratic State Officials opted to secede from the Union.

When Abraham Lincoln and the Republican Union finally defeated the Confederates in 1865, many southern Democrat landowners refused to respect the freedom to former slaves and formed the terrorist organization, the KKK.
Brainwashed Liberal: The Republican party hates people of color. They are all about keeping the poor man working in slavery. It's the Democratic party that is a friend of the black man.

Old School Republican: The Republican party is about personal responsibility. You get only what you've worked for and earned. If Democrats had their way they would tax us all into slaves of the government. Open a history book.
by Markwonder September 27, 2011
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Nobel Peace Prize

1. An award now given out frivolously.
2. An award given to President Barack Obama based on his first 17 days in office. The nomination deadline for the prize was 17 days after he took office.
3. An award given the President Barack Obama on the basis of the "hope" he inspires and what he "might" do while President.
The Nobel Peace Prize is yet another attempt to apologize for slavery.
by Markwonder October 09, 2009
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Law of wrong way

The law of wrong way states that: "While driving in the city, any missed or wrong turn and subsequent backtracking to find your original route will be met by frustratingly slow moving traffic and red lights at every intersection.

Many, if not all of these red lights will be Full-cycle red lights."
While trying to find the corporate building downtown, I missed my turn and ended up backtracking an extra 3 miles, through 4 busy intersections, while following two old ladies, a Vespa scooter and a garbage truck. The law of wrong way was in effect.

Needless to say, I missed the Boss's luncheon and didn't get the promotion. FML.
by Markwonder October 28, 2010
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Shart

When you push too hard to fart and end up shitting your drawers.
Shart philosophy seen on bathroom wall:

Here I sit all broken hearted, came to shit but only farted.
Then one day I took a chance, went to fart and shit my pants.
by Markwonder March 04, 2011
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Smart-ass

What Joe Biden thinks you are if you ask him to lower the U.S. citizens' tax burden.
While visiting Kopp's frozen custard shop in Milwaukee where smart-ass Custard Shop Manager Scott Borkin was on duty, Vice President Joe Biden was sampling some of the tasty treats.

Biden: "What do I owe you for the delicious custard?"

Smart-ass Custard Shop Manager Scott Borkin: “Don’t worry, it’s on the house. … Lower our taxes and we’ll call it even.”

Biden: “Why don’t you say something nice instead of being a Smart–ass all the time?”

Smart-ass Custard Shop Manager Scott Borkin: (Thinking) This motherfucker just lost my vote.
by markwonder August 30, 2010
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Hate

Usually an emotion expressed by those on the left of the political spectrum when they are confronted with an opinion or a situation that goes against their beliefs or ideals.
Hate towards Miss California Carrie Prejean because of her opinion on gay marriage.

Hate towards our men and women in uniform defending this country, especially anytime a Republican is in the White House.

Hate towards anybody making a decent living for themselves.

Bristol Palin's success on "Dancing with the Stars" brought out the worst kind of liberal hate.
by Markwonder December 09, 2010
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