Lârry Dângüs, esq.'s definitions
The lesbian daughter of former US vice president Dick Cheney. Mary Cheney and her life partner, Heather Poe, have two children, Dr. Quinn and Medicine Woman, both of whom are the result of a lesbian miracle. Ms. Cheney revealed in a recent interview that her children's names were inspired by a line of dialogue spoken by fictional race car driver Ricky Bobby in Ms. Cheney's favorite film, Talladega Nights.
Noted gay columnist Dan Savage has publicly referred to Ms. Cheney as a "useless dyke" due to her active involvement with the Bush Administration and the half-assed stand she has taken for gay rights. Mary Cheney responded to Savage's remark with a thinly-veiled threat to have her dark lord father send him to Guantanamo Bay, presumably to be tortured and held indefinitely without charges, as is customary in the post-9/11 police state formerly known as the United States of America.
Noted gay columnist Dan Savage has publicly referred to Ms. Cheney as a "useless dyke" due to her active involvement with the Bush Administration and the half-assed stand she has taken for gay rights. Mary Cheney responded to Savage's remark with a thinly-veiled threat to have her dark lord father send him to Guantanamo Bay, presumably to be tortured and held indefinitely without charges, as is customary in the post-9/11 police state formerly known as the United States of America.
Mary Cheney was the director of vice presidential operations for the Bush-Cheney 2004 Presidential re-election campaign, which is rather ironic considering the fact that the Bush Administration's official policy on gays and lesbians is that they "should all shut the hell up and stop being all gay and stuff"*.
*quote by former Attorney General John Ashcroft, 2004
*quote by former Attorney General John Ashcroft, 2004
by Lârry Dângüs, esq. January 4, 2012
Get the Mary Cheneymug. This term refers to a gratuitous back-handed pop in the testicles, as delivered by Ashley Schaeffer to Kenny Powers in the HBO series Eastbound and Down.
It is ordinarily considered bad form to give an ashley schaeffer under most circumstances, however, this rule tends to loosen when excessive amounts of alcohol are added to the equation. It is often hypothesized that male drinking buddies who regularly execute the ashley schaeffer may suffer from unrequited homosexual desires. Either that, or they just have a really sadistic sense of humor. Either way, the ashley schaeffer is rarely funny to the recipient.
It is ordinarily considered bad form to give an ashley schaeffer under most circumstances, however, this rule tends to loosen when excessive amounts of alcohol are added to the equation. It is often hypothesized that male drinking buddies who regularly execute the ashley schaeffer may suffer from unrequited homosexual desires. Either that, or they just have a really sadistic sense of humor. Either way, the ashley schaeffer is rarely funny to the recipient.
The church pastor failed to see the humor in my quick and ruthless delivery of an ashley schaeffer to his holy ballsack. Maybe I should have waited until the sermon was over.
by Lârry Dângüs, esq. July 23, 2009
Get the ashley schaeffermug. Making the critical mistake of letting the internet decide things.
Back story:
Boaty McBoatface (also known as Boaty) is the British lead boat in a fleet of three robotic lithium battery–powered autonomous underwater vehicles (AUVs) of the Autosub Long Range (ALR) class. Launched in 2017 and carried on board the polar scientific research vessel RRS Sir David Attenborough, she is a focal point of the Polar Explorer Programme of the UK Government.
The name Boaty McBoatface was originally proposed in a March 2016 #NameOurShip online poll to name the £200 million polar scientific research ship being constructed in the Cammell Laird shipyard in Birkenhead for the United Kingdom's Natural Environment Research Council (NERC).2 BBC Radio Jersey presenter James Hand coined the humorous suggestion Boaty McBoatface for the poll, and the name quickly became the most popular choice by far, with 33% of the vote to 11% for the second choice. The name was described as a homage to Hooty McOwlface, an owl named through an "Adopt-a-Bird" programme in 2012 that became popular on the Internet.
Back story:
Boaty McBoatface (also known as Boaty) is the British lead boat in a fleet of three robotic lithium battery–powered autonomous underwater vehicles (AUVs) of the Autosub Long Range (ALR) class. Launched in 2017 and carried on board the polar scientific research vessel RRS Sir David Attenborough, she is a focal point of the Polar Explorer Programme of the UK Government.
The name Boaty McBoatface was originally proposed in a March 2016 #NameOurShip online poll to name the £200 million polar scientific research ship being constructed in the Cammell Laird shipyard in Birkenhead for the United Kingdom's Natural Environment Research Council (NERC).2 BBC Radio Jersey presenter James Hand coined the humorous suggestion Boaty McBoatface for the poll, and the name quickly became the most popular choice by far, with 33% of the vote to 11% for the second choice. The name was described as a homage to Hooty McOwlface, an owl named through an "Adopt-a-Bird" programme in 2012 that became popular on the Internet.
by Lârry Dângüs, esq. May 12, 2024
Get the McBoatfacingmug. Sharing a bathroom with male roommates can be tricky at times. The key to proper lavatory planning often entails getting in your morning shower before someone else decides to raise a stink.
by Lârry Dângüs, esq. July 20, 2010
Get the raise a stinkmug. a heavy handwoven reversible textile used for hangings, curtains, and upholstery and characterized by complicated pictorial designs, and covered in dried semen. A fapestry is usually the result of someone fapping onto the same tapestry over a long period of time until it becomes rigid enough to throw like a big square frisbee.
"I wouldn't lean up against the thing on my wall, there bro - it's got my baby batter all over it."
"What the fuck? Why didn't you warn me this thing was a fapestry before I put my hand on it?!?"
"What the fuck? Why didn't you warn me this thing was a fapestry before I put my hand on it?!?"
by Lârry Dângüs, esq. October 10, 2011
Get the fapestrymug. by Lârry Dângüs, esq. August 27, 2013
Get the grandbastardmug. The Mango Mussolini's attempt to pronounce the word 'Tesla' while he turns the White House into a car sales lot.
"I LOVE TESLERR"
by Lârry Dângüs, esq. May 1, 2025
Get the TESLERRmug.