Definitions by Korgmeister
don quixote
In a teamwork situation, an extremely irrational person, who takes charge of a project through sheer force of will rather than competence and leads it in a direction which guarantees failure.
Background: The Don Quixote of literature had a tendency to do extraordinarily stupid things without thinking them through. But people were loathe to try and stop him on account of his being a few cans short of a six pack.
Background: The Don Quixote of literature had a tendency to do extraordinarily stupid things without thinking them through. But people were loathe to try and stop him on account of his being a few cans short of a six pack.
I am officially referring to my project leader as "Don Quixote" from this point on. She's got the idea in her head that she, rather than the boss, defines the project KPIs. I'm going along with it because a good performance appraisal is not worth the next few months of my life being made a living hell by that crazy-ass bitch!
don quixote by Korgmeister April 2, 2005
bipartisan support
You are being screwed.
Background: In any parliamentary system the only thing all the parties have in common is an interest in screwing over the people who voted them in. As a result, if they're agreeing on anything, it's almost certainly not in your interest.
Background: In any parliamentary system the only thing all the parties have in common is an interest in screwing over the people who voted them in. As a result, if they're agreeing on anything, it's almost certainly not in your interest.
Today the "orphans, puppies and kittens bill" was passed with overwhelming bipartisan support, allowing all tax evaders to be shot on sight without due process.
bipartisan support by Korgmeister March 21, 2005
scientific consensus
Translation from scientist to normal person speak: We honestly have no fucking idea.
Sometimes, even scientists don't know what's going on. At times like that they tend to act like everyone else, which is that they assume the most popular idea must be correct. Unfortunately, this is sophistry, not science.
Sometimes, even scientists don't know what's going on. At times like that they tend to act like everyone else, which is that they assume the most popular idea must be correct. Unfortunately, this is sophistry, not science.
Dr John Snow, I am tired of your incessant prattling about Cholera being a water-born disease! There is a scientific consensus that it is spread by a miasma and that is final!
scientific consensus by Korgmeister March 21, 2005
URL me
A heavily contracted way of saying "My good friend, I would be ever so pleased if you could send me a URL related to WHATEVER THE HELL IT IS YOU'RE GODDAMNED TALKING ABOUT!"
Inspired by Homer Simpson's method of requesting a Beer from Marge - "Beer me!"
Inspired by Homer Simpson's method of requesting a Beer from Marge - "Beer me!"
URL me by Korgmeister March 21, 2005
trabant builder
A programmer who insists upon writing user-hostile code, simply because it's easier to do and doesn't want to admit their own lazyness and contempt for end users.
Most (but not all) Linux programmers are Trabant Builders.
Background: Communist East Germany produced a car called the Trabant. By some accounts it was an engineering marvel, as it could be built and taken apart using only 3 or 5 spanners. However, it was a rather pathetic car and nobody in their right mind drove one by choice.
Most (but not all) Linux programmers are Trabant Builders.
Background: Communist East Germany produced a car called the Trabant. By some accounts it was an engineering marvel, as it could be built and taken apart using only 3 or 5 spanners. However, it was a rather pathetic car and nobody in their right mind drove one by choice.
D00d1: I wanted to make an AMV using Kino, but it turns out it's only compatible with one single codec. When I asked why he did that, he said it was easier to program and should change it myself if I'm not happy.
D00d2: Whoa! What a Trabant Builder!
D00d2: Whoa! What a Trabant Builder!
trabant builder by Korgmeister March 21, 2005
kodaked
verb, transitive, past-tense.
Infinitive form: to kodak.
Present/future tense form: kodakking.
Definition: To involuntarily suffer near-total to total data loss to your hard drives. Especially if due to poorly programmed proprietary software that comes with new hardware.
Background: Some versions of Kodak Easyshare software had a tendency to mung FAT32 partitions. Yes, I was one of the victims of that delightful little bug.
Infinitive form: to kodak.
Present/future tense form: kodakking.
Definition: To involuntarily suffer near-total to total data loss to your hard drives. Especially if due to poorly programmed proprietary software that comes with new hardware.
Background: Some versions of Kodak Easyshare software had a tendency to mung FAT32 partitions. Yes, I was one of the victims of that delightful little bug.
Fucking driver update totally kodaked my box, and I have an assignment due tomorrow!...URGE TO KILL, RISING!
kodaked by Korgmeister March 15, 2005
NMFP
Earnest young Christians have WWJD as their acronyn du jour.
Cynics have NMFP - Not My Fucking Problem.
Recite this calming mantra the next time someone tries to make your life unnecessarily difficult.
Cynics have NMFP - Not My Fucking Problem.
Recite this calming mantra the next time someone tries to make your life unnecessarily difficult.
Lumbergh: Umm, this project is kind of, err, behind schedule. So if you could, umm, come in Saturday...that'd be greeeat.
Me: Do I get overtime loading?
Lumbergh: Err...no. Payroll's been on my ass lately.
Me: Sorry dude. NMFP. Find someone else.
Me: Do I get overtime loading?
Lumbergh: Err...no. Payroll's been on my ass lately.
Me: Sorry dude. NMFP. Find someone else.
NMFP by Korgmeister March 15, 2005