Kez 4 Prez's definitions

Trumped-up charges

Criminal charges which are so untrue, stupid, impossible and offensive that you just want to punch someone in the face.

Kevin's been looking for a fight, ever since the cops arrested him on those bullshit trumped-up charges.

by Kez 4 Prez April 12, 2017

Facebook mother

Someone on Facebook, usually a female, who drifts through their friends pages being a general comfort in other peoples affairs, needlessly bolstering courage, settling arguments which don't concern them, and remembering family events their friends never even told them about and certainly didn't invite them to. They offer unwanted marital and relationship advice. They make uncalled for suggestions about how to raise children. They tell busy, stressed mothers they should take a break "because you deserve it, hon" and they gently admonish fathers to make sure their wife " gets a little me-time". They promise to reveal hearty beef recipes (but never actually give any recipes away) and offer to knit baby clothes (but never actually knit any). Facebook mothers, like, totally get in the way in stressful times, and somebody should tell them to mind their own business, but nobody ever does.

Sue: I see your Facebook mother has been offering unsolicited advice again.
Joy: Yes, and if she wasn't so darn nice i'd tell her where she can stick her nosy suggestions.

by Kez 4 Prez June 13, 2016

Wifehunter

An online male predator who sends bulk unsolicited emails to attractive women, on sites such as Hotmail, MySpace and Facebook, with the apparent intention of forming a long term relationship.

Wifehunter emails - as with most other unsolicited mail - often conceal hidden agendas and women should be extra careful if they choose to respond.

Dammit.... I just cleared 20 wifehunter emails out of my hotmail account! This is getting ridiculous!

by Kez 4 Prez November 25, 2010

Canversation

Talking on the phone while you're using the toilet.

I'm not comfortable having this obvious canversation, can we talk when you're finished?

by Kez 4 Prez April 19, 2017

bumtum

A tum that looks like a bum. Usually occurs when a person gains weight and develops a crack down the centre of their stomach, with flabby asscheeks on either side. Can also be the result of hernia.

Sharon had better lose some weight, she's developing quite a bumtum there.

by Kez 4 Prez April 12, 2017

Down in the Trumps

The feeling of depression and sense of impending doom that sweeps through a person when they think about how Donald Trump is fucking up the world.

Nick has been Down in the Trumps ever since he watched that documentary about Donald Trump on TV.

by Kez 4 Prez April 12, 2017

vaginal depth

The new age unit of measurement for use in interpersonal relations. Until now penis length has been the standard. However vaginal depth is far more useful for both women and men, as it shows who is compatible with whom (every bloke obviously knowing his penis length).

Mick keeps bragging about having a ten inch dick. He's going to find out how useful that is - NOT - when he hears that Emily only has a vaginal depth of 7 inches.

by Kez 4 Prez March 29, 2017