Definitions by KRiver

Thrift Shopping 

Going to Bars on busy nights such as Valentine’s Day to “shop” for someone else’s unwanted “Second Hand crap”.

Jacob was feeling lonely on Valentine’s Day, so he went downtown around midnight to do some “Thrift Shopping”.

Thrift Shopping by KRiver February 14, 2020

Friendoworker

When you’re kind of friends with a coworker, but won’t classify them as one or the other because of your fear of commitment.

Jacob took his Friendoworker out for pizza on their lunch break today for a meeting with “benefits”.

Friendoworker by KRiver September 26, 2019

Scorpoline 

An embarrassing maneuver that can happen when your parents make you go to a Labor Day BBQ at your uncle Jimmys doublewide complex in “the country”, your cousins convince you to try a backflip on their $189 Sams Club trampoline, Resulting in a upside down faceplant so hard that your spine curves up like a scorpions tail and your heels hit you in the back of the head.

Keep and eye on the grill, Chuck, that city kid just went full Scorpoline.

Scorpoline by KRiver September 4, 2019

Blumpcan 

When an individual consumes a canned alcoholic beverage while utilizing a private or public toilet.

Brian’s girlfriend wouldn’t give him a Blumpkin, so, Brian had a Blumpcan instead.

Blumpcan by KRiver August 14, 2019

Suck It. 

An informal greeting or goodbye, similar to, “Aloha”.

Today Dawson told me to, Suck It. after happy hour.

Suck It. by KRiver September 28, 2018

Chuff Lock 

Wrestling term, basically a Full Nelson except the individual performing the move also inserts their dick inside the anus of the recipient. Creating a 3 point hold that’s impossible to break free from.

Today in gym class, Coach Dawson put me in a Chuff Lock....

Chuff Lock by KRiver September 16, 2018

Reverse Hitler 

A vengeful sexual maneuver where you find out your partner is sympathetic toward people of the Jewish religion or descent, so to get even, you "go dry" into their Butthole, proceeding to ejaculate into their Rectum to create 6 million fleeting lives in a gas chamber.

Last night, Audriana said she wasn't gonna eat the Pork Loin I smoked. So after she finished her Bagel, I made her watch American History X, then I gave her a Reverse Hitler!

Reverse Hitler by KRiver March 8, 2017