Your grandma's dick-shaped shrubbery.
I got sick of lookin' at those phallodendron, so I cut the tops off. Now they look like Bop-em mallets.
by JoshuaJordan May 14, 2008
Possibly explained as a punctuated Wolf Bite, the Dog Bark is a sweaty, chaffing ass crack's wake-up-fart. It's a well known fact that farting hurts, when you've got a Wolf Bite. Now you know that such a fart (in which every vibration and clap is felt like a slap on sunburn) is called a Dog Bark.
Damn, I knowed I shouldn'a ate them Crunch Wraps before I goed jogging. Them shits gave me the Dog Bark hard core, son.
by JoshuaJordan May 09, 2008
The paradoxical visual juxtaposition of a youthful-looking vaginal area/pelvic triangle coupled by bloated and probably overstimulated, dirty and discolored labia.
Wizard sleeves - far before the vagina's time.
Wizard sleeves - far before the vagina's time.
I saw you staring at Anberlin's booty-shorts camel toe, but you don't know that bitch gots loaded baked potato!
by JoshuaJordan August 20, 2008
Urinating in a public, men's bathroom that has more than one urinal and opting to, rather than use one urinal and stick to it, run the gauntlet and piss in all of the urinals in a continuous stream. Usually performed while drunk, although sober attempts are acceptable.
I got out of the movie and there was nobody there, except this old dude taking a shit. So, I did an Irish drive-by.
by JoshuaJordan May 10, 2008
by JoshuaJordan October 23, 2009
A rightfully underknown and possibly useless product designed to wrap around your seat belt, cushioning your big tiddies (titties) from any discomfort and, thusly, promoting personal safety for the unjustly buxom and repugnantly obese. This plush apparatus is designed to be inconspicuously disguised as a small teddy bear, when not in use, hence the name.
"My shoulder strap used to pull so tight I could hardly breathe. Now, with the Tiddy Bear, I really enjoy traveling again." (actual quote from a real Tiddy Bear advertisement)
by JoshuaJordan May 11, 2008
That special cigarette that seems to come in every pack which induces the need to shit.
You will know you've had a shiterette, when you step out to smoke and any possible bathroom signals your body has previously sent to your brain, unnoticed, suddenly hit you full force after your first drag or two. A shiterette is usually impossible to enjoy because - although you refuse to do the sensible thing by extinguishing your smoke, going to the bathroom and returning to smoke afterward - the whole time you are smoking, you can't enjoy it because all you can think about is how badly you have to take a shit.
You will know you've had a shiterette, when you step out to smoke and any possible bathroom signals your body has previously sent to your brain, unnoticed, suddenly hit you full force after your first drag or two. A shiterette is usually impossible to enjoy because - although you refuse to do the sensible thing by extinguishing your smoke, going to the bathroom and returning to smoke afterward - the whole time you are smoking, you can't enjoy it because all you can think about is how badly you have to take a shit.
Rent Fan - "Oh my god, Sister Christian, why are you standing all stiff and uncomfortable? Enjoy your smoke break, already. It's like a little vacation!"
Sister Christian - "I got a shiterette and all I can think about is my damn gas pains, fool."
Rent fan - "Oh my god! Don't even get me started on butt problems!"
Sister Christian - "I got a shiterette and all I can think about is my damn gas pains, fool."
Rent fan - "Oh my god! Don't even get me started on butt problems!"
by JoshuaJordan August 24, 2008