As I opened the bay windows of my kent townhouse, I was welcomed by my morning ritual of diesel and wafts of stale piss and belching from the concrete abomination that is "the sweaty gusset" lorry park.
by Joe Smiff November 12, 2020
(Noun) The act of posting staged, attention-hungry content online in a desperate attempt for validation, usually ends in secondhand embarrassment.
When the brand deals dry up and she starts posting ‘sleeping prank’ videos fully glammed in makeup whilst pretending to be fast asleep, that’s pure cringicism.
by Joe Smiff June 10, 2025
The masterful kung-fu act of suppressing a giant mud rock into a deep slumber using only a well-disciplined sphyncter.
Had a prawn and boiled egg vindaloo last night and its playing up with my guts, luckily I managed to summon a colonic death grip to avoid shitting myself in Asda.
by Joe Smiff September 06, 2022
Entitled or narcissistic individuals who film bizarre and deperate acts in the hope for validation from strangers on social media. This normally comes at the expense of invading the privacy and personal space of innocent people.
by Joe Smiff October 11, 2023
I was in up to the apricots last night, Mindy let out a huge fart after, we both laughed then I went and made the dinner.
by Joe Smiff October 20, 2023
An event where the only person engaged with the music is the DJ or band, while the audience chooses to film the experience instead of being fully present in the moment.
Went to this weird club last night where the cringy DJs were the only people dancing. Everybody was on their phone, no vibe, souless atmosphere, a total cunt gathering.
by Joe Smiff October 17, 2024
To cut costs UK prisons found that introducing oatmeal for breakfast would reduce the usage of toilet paper by 87%
Prisoners from South London would often call out to their governor, "Guv, I shit an ace innit" and roars of cheers would resonate around the young offenders wing of the prison.
Prisoners from South London would often call out to their governor, "Guv, I shit an ace innit" and roars of cheers would resonate around the young offenders wing of the prison.
by Joe Smiff March 01, 2024