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James Dracon's definitions

otlog

The Origional Toaster Lover's Of Guelph.
A group of women shunned, men, located in Guelph, that some say the former Sir James stole the name of his enemy revolutionaries from. This group who call them selves
Otlog for short have long been outraged at James' behaviour, claiming he shunned and disgraced his real father, whom they claim was Otlog's deceased founder, and the only member of Otlog to ever have had relations with a real woman.
James denies any knowleage of such a group, but says that if they love toasters they are of course his enemy. This further outraged the group who claim if they had the resources would indeed rise up to take James and his armies down. Some of their members try frequently and ineffectually to thwart and or capture James, and his comrades.
However on August 17th 2007, they almost suceeded by poisoning James' drink at a party, causing temporary amnesia and inability to articulate, spiralling into the events that led to his de-knighting.
After a brief retreat into terrified hiding the Otlog has been heard bragging, out of James' arms reach, anyway.
Also it is good to note, that unlike the possibly fictional Toaster Lovers of James' rantings in his war on the Toaster Revolution, these toaster lovers actually have relations with toasters.
The Otlog only wishes for two things: to marry toasters, and to get James killed.
by James Dracon February 8, 2008
mugGet the otlogmug.

the cartoon defense

The defense of an action because it occurred in a cartoon.
Nothing is a serious issue if it previously was featured in a cartoon, in that case the action is clearly meant to be all fun and games, and if you disagree you suck.
I wasn't harassing and stalking that woman, Pepe le Pew does it all the time.
Classic use of the Cartoon Defense.
by James Dracon February 7, 2013
mugGet the the cartoon defensemug.

The Toaster Revolution

A political movement. The name The Toaster Revloution,came about for reasons unclear. What ever the reason the use of toasters, or rather the "correct" use of toasters has played a large part in splitting people on the issue. There are murmers of an underground war on the issue, the opposition headed by a man formerly known as Sir. James and now just as James, and the Toaster Revolution rumoured to be headed by various people through out history.
It is debated by some that James stole the name from the actual Toaster Lovers in Guelph (who actually did love toasters because women shunned them), and fabricated the entire revolution as a cover to hide some nefarious deeds of his own, the nature and origion of which noone can guess. Though certain conspiracy theorists, have tied it all in with a group of evil walrus people, who are said to live under the ground somewhere in the general area of Canada, and the northern United States, whom they believe to be the real governing force behind those countries as well as many others. The "evil walrii" as they call them are said to be coming to a war with the "Vikings under Norway" (similar idea as with the evil walruses but the walruses rely more on technology, and are walruses), in which the fate of human kind will be decided (eigther way human's reign would theoretically come to an end, it would merely be a question of complete annihilation or slavery).
Many lives were lost in the Toaster Revolution.
by James Dracon February 8, 2008
mugGet the The Toaster Revolutionmug.

The Mime Army

Just a tiny part of the awful truth about "Canada", the Mime Army is the forced military of the country that is known of as "Canada" that the world knows.
It is thought that the idea to create an army of unwilling mimes came about when the governing forces of "Canada" decided it would look weird if they didn't have soldiers that didn't look like the hideous hulking walruses they are, and that forcing mimes to be soldiers against their will was fun and hilarious.
Actually members of a mime guild, the inhabitants of "Canada" and the rest of the world do not know of the Mime Army's plight. The evil walrii, the real governing force of "Canada" and possibly the United States, with the use of sound devices, speak for the mime/soldier's when their voices need be heard.

The mime army unfortunately will not speak out about their plight due to the member's strict and heartfelt vow of silence, which all mimes adhere to, and the threat of murder by the Clown Death Squad (see Clown Death Squad).
New mimes are "recruited" frequently by the Clown Death Squad, forced or coerced using the mimes' financial situation (the demand for mimes has been dwindling with the growing, but superficial, social popularity of "freedom of speech" and the like), so training them is unnecessary as members are easily replaced if killed due to their ineptitude or lack of adequate equipment.
The Mime Army's plight continues to remain unnoticed and any who know of it refuse to speak or gesture of it.
No one wants to speak about the Mime Army.
by James Dracon June 4, 2011
mugGet the The Mime Armymug.

The Gosling Army

The army made up of geese employed by the former Sir. James in his war on Toaster Lovers. There was and still is much debate as to whether or not they are usefull, or effective soldiers, and whether James' mind has just completely gone to the alcohol. Regardless some still blame the change in migratory patterns among geese in areas where James is active on the geese's obligations by their employment in The War on Toasters. Some even go so far as to claim the geese are forced to wear shock collars that restrict their movement within certain cities though this has never been confirmed.
This Park is said to be patrolled by the Gosling Army.
by James Dracon February 5, 2008
mugGet the The Gosling Armymug.

Toaster Lover

The proclaimed enemies of Sir. James, in his war on the Toaster Revoltution. Called Toaster Lover more for their political agendas than for an actual propensity to physically love toasters.... though some have made a motion that it should be legal for a person to enter into matrimony with a toaster.
"I'll get ye, ye toaster lover" (direct Sir James qoute)
by James Dracon February 3, 2008
mugGet the Toaster Lovermug.

The Clown Death Squad

The band of sociopathic, and psychopathic killers, located primarily in what is called "Canada" that are said to have escaped persecuton in other countries. Some time in the mid nineteen sixties they apparently convinced the emperor of "canada" that he had hired them and ordered them to kill anyone who violated his will. They continue to inform the emporer when someone has in fact done this, and what his will is at any given time. Some have cited it is very fortunate the clown death squad have few real political agendas.
Origionally the death squad did not dress up as clowns, it was shortly after their founding that they were said to have adopted the idea as part of a plan to improve public relations. Others say this is ridiculous as they "can hardly be said to be concerned with public feeling", and that the death squad merely didn't want to admit they just liked to dress as clowns.
Some also say the incongrous emperor owes his life, to the Clown Death Squad. As the matriarchal warriors of "Canada" would surely have killed him by now.
The Clown Death Squad are a squad with out actually loyalty, and many believe they are often in the employ of the evil walrii, who live underneath "canada", and possibly the northern united States (their subversive reign is said to be steadily growing) in wait of their rise to take over the world. The evil walrii said to be responsible for the entire sham of the "fake, fake Canada" known to the rest of the world, and the imprisonment of the "real" canadians (The RCP), are also said to order the Clown Death Squad to kill anyone who even slightly betrays the truth about the goings on, in "Canada", as well as the killing of anyone who learns to much of their evil plots. It is said that the former Sir. James "war on Toasters", or "war on the toaster revoltion" is really all just a front, for a true cause wrapped somewhere up in the truth about "Canada", the evil walrii, and the vikings under norway, but he had to disguise it because his knowledge could be dangerous to him and his "troops". Of course it has been theorized that everything the former Sir. James does, could mean something other than what he says, whether it be the effects of long term alcohol abuse, or conspiracies involving evil walrii. However one might note that dispite behaviour that normally would get a person killed the former Sir. James, and his cause remains alive and operating.
Ahhhhh it's the Clown Death Squad!(followed by gutteral, gurgley dieing sounds)
by James Dracon February 22, 2008
mugGet the The Clown Death Squadmug.

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