When you're all horny in your trailer at night and want to have a special fap, so you sneak into kitchen and grab a can of Great Value sweet peas. You open the can with your Dollar Tree can opener and dowse the peas in canola oil. You then proceed to fuck the can of peas, but because all of the products you use are cheap and you are poor and stupid, there's a jagged piece of metal on the rim of the can that suddenly splits your dick down the middle. BAM! Now you've got split peen soup.
Girlfriend: We haven't had sex in two weeks. What's wrong with you?
Boyfriend: I didn't want to say anything, but last week I had three servings of split peen soup..."
Boyfriend: I didn't want to say anything, but last week I had three servings of split peen soup..."
by Jack Atrophy August 06, 2022
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Get the red rimmer mug.1. When your penis is covered in feces after engaging in anal sex.
2. When you are engaged in anal sex and a sharp turd pricks the tip of your penis.
2. When you are engaged in anal sex and a sharp turd pricks the tip of your penis.
by Jack Atrophy August 06, 2022
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Get the praymate mug."Have you seen J'Quan, Mrs. Goshberg's' new boyfriend?"
"Yes, I see she's found another goy toy to play with."
"Yes, I see she's found another goy toy to play with."
by Jack Atrophy August 06, 2022
Get the goy toy mug.Helga is the best spraymate ever. She drinks a lot of mountain dew before coming to one of our sessions.
by Jack Atrophy August 09, 2022
Get the spraymate mug.The practice of not emotionally investing oneself in the grand outcome of humanity while approaching society as an amusing spectacle. This attitude was famously espoused by comedian George Carlin.
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