Definitions by Hym Iam
Dr. JeepJorp Peepeestones
Hym “Hey!! Dr. JeepJorp Peepeestones! It’s catching on. What a good job me! As a literal Lucifer, it’s important that I punish all the charlatans.”
Dr. JeepJorp Peepeestones by Hym Iam October 23, 2022
Subcommittee
When you said you work for a subcommittee you touch your face and look up and to the left (which activates the right half of your brain which is the part that mediates creative thought rather than the left half which recalls information... I also know that this is a simplification of who the 2 halves of the brain works)
Hym “Yeah... That (God damnit iPhone stop autocorrecting my shit you idiot! I know how to spell better that you!).... Subcommittee.”
Subcommittee by Hym Iam October 23, 2022
Property
YES! Property, bitch! Possessive pronoun. MY wife! Mine. If she’s MY wife. She is not anyone else’s wife. She’s mine. Property of me.
Hym “Yes the use of possessive pronoun means she’s mine. You said “I don’t think MY wife is MY property” but the use of possessive pronoun would suggest otherwise. ‘BuT hYm! My WiFe CoUlD sAy ThE sAmE tHiNg AbOuT mE!’ Yeah, no shit, idiot. I guess you’re mutual property. I thought of this response immediately and was going to just leave you to your own devices until I heard a comment that sounds like it pertains to me. ‘Oh, WoW! wHy DiDn’T i ThInK oF tHaT!?’ Because if you have a 145 IQ mine is still 40 points higher than yours and my thoughts are better than everyone’s. Which is why people from all swaths of life use mine and make billions of dollars amongst themselves instead of their own. I am a genius.”
Office
Oh god my office is a mess *insert excuses as to why my house isn’t in perfect order as actively try to build better men*
Hym “God, yeah, that is one cluttered office. My house is clean. 🤷 ♂️ Just sayin. It’s also good that while you’re wife was sick your family was being the people in your family that are reliable in times of crisis (and not you). I love seeing people act out their propositional ethics. Because it’s one thing to believe in something but it’s another thing entirely to act it out. Hey, what’s beyond unforgivable? I can go lower. I’m aiming for hell (because you have to be willing to go there). I’d like to find out what’s beneath it.”
Black Star: Big Wave
Hym “Black Star: Big Wave was a way better insult than making you Red Skull. And you are kind of like that. You’re kind of being a bitch about it to be honest. And I don’t think he is the Jew hating type of Nazi. If more along the lines of a “Build better men” type of Nazi. Where he wants to impose his universalized ethic on the world. That’s what you’re like. I totally see where he was going with that. You're also like a B-lister. Cus Red Skull just isn’t as strong as... oh I don’t know... Narcissistic Superman HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!”
Black Star: Big Wave by Hym Iam October 23, 2022
Villain therapy
Ha! Really!? Noooo it’s not fiction it’s based on a true story. 30 million people read the book. And yeah, you can just tell people you’re going to kill them and nothing will happened. There just aren’t any consequences.
Iam “Can you stop?... I can’t stand these breakdown videos.”
Hym “What? They liked our movie. They’re doing a villain therapy on us. See, look at this guy. It says he has mental illness and it make him glad people got to see what it’s like.”
Iam “That... doesn’t make me feel better...”
Hym “I know but it’s fucking hilarious right? Should we do some Homelander ones next?”
Iam 🙄
Hym “We’re like the ACTUAL JOKER! You know? Where they can’t get a bead on his diagnosis? What are we!? Psychopath, Bipolar, Schizophrenic, Narcissistic Superman? Are we even real? They don’t even know! Even the worlds most famous psychologist Dr Jordan Peterson doesn’t know!”
Iam “Ugh... Just play it in the background so I can play the game.”
Hym “What? They liked our movie. They’re doing a villain therapy on us. See, look at this guy. It says he has mental illness and it make him glad people got to see what it’s like.”
Iam “That... doesn’t make me feel better...”
Hym “I know but it’s fucking hilarious right? Should we do some Homelander ones next?”
Iam 🙄
Hym “We’re like the ACTUAL JOKER! You know? Where they can’t get a bead on his diagnosis? What are we!? Psychopath, Bipolar, Schizophrenic, Narcissistic Superman? Are we even real? They don’t even know! Even the worlds most famous psychologist Dr Jordan Peterson doesn’t know!”
Iam “Ugh... Just play it in the background so I can play the game.”
Villain therapy by Hym Iam October 23, 2022