Herbert Schweffe's definitions
Schofielding
Hiding ones sexual orientation in plain view. Preferably for a number of decades and under the red hot glare of the media spotlight.
Hiding ones sexual orientation in plain view. Preferably for a number of decades and under the red hot glare of the media spotlight.
As the interview reached its climax, the silver haired chat show host couldn't keep his eyes off the Iraq war veterans bulging biceps. "What must he look like with his top off" he wondered. The commercial break couldn't come quick enough. As he ran to the green room toilets, he discharged violently and without control, soaking the crouch and one entire trouser leg of his immaculately tailored Saville Row suit.
"Enough's enough!" he exclaimed, as his Producer towelled him dry
"it really is time to tell the kids."
"I totally agree" sighed his long suffering Producer,
"you really have been Schofielding for way too long."
"Enough's enough!" he exclaimed, as his Producer towelled him dry
"it really is time to tell the kids."
"I totally agree" sighed his long suffering Producer,
"you really have been Schofielding for way too long."
by Herbert Schweffe February 7, 2020
Get the Schofieldingmug. The vision of Tracey's swinging knockers was too much for Liam to bare. As he sat on the bus with his shopping bags hiding his bulge, he discharged violently and without contol, filling his trousers with a seemingly endless stream of cock sick.
He felt hollow, desperate to clean up his awful mess. But with 8 stops to go he could do nothing but let himself dry, the spunk fusing his leg hairs to his pants like Human Glue
He felt hollow, desperate to clean up his awful mess. But with 8 stops to go he could do nothing but let himself dry, the spunk fusing his leg hairs to his pants like Human Glue
by Herbert Schweffe August 19, 2018
Get the Human Gluemug. At Grandad’s wake, Uncle Mungo creeped over to me, he stank of semen and cigarettes... he was clearly pleased to see me, judging by the way he dribbled in my ear and rubbed his crotch on my thigh as he forced me into a horrific GUG...,
I hate gugging at a family get-together, it really puts me off Auntie Tabatha’s excellent scotch eggs.
I hate gugging at a family get-together, it really puts me off Auntie Tabatha’s excellent scotch eggs.
by Herbert Schweffe June 2, 2021
Get the Gugmug. Rancid bodily secretions that mingle in the cracks and folds around the male anus, ballsack and chode; creating pungent yet sickenly appealing scratch and sniff opportunities.
Though the cameras of the world were pointing his way, the German football manager couldn’t resist reaching deep inside his trousers to scoop up some of the sweaty discharge that had collected deep inside his arse crack. As he drew his gruby fingers towards his mouth he inhaled deeply, the intoxicating aroma of last nights spunk and this morning’s skid marks filled his nostrils. ‘Who cares about the score when you have all this delicious man muck collecting in your pants!?’ He sighed
by Herbert Schweffe October 30, 2018
Get the Man Muckmug. by Herbert Schweffe November 15, 2017
Get the cyockmug. Planked - Hit with the ugly stick
by Herbert Schweffe February 23, 2021
Get the Plankedmug. To mum's horror, Simon pulled off his trousers and paraded around the sitting room; proudly sticking his angry erection in the air like a big flesh chimney.
by Herbert Schweffe November 15, 2017
Get the flesh chimneymug.