When your sergeant salutes you with an erection because he just found out equality is better for morale than sexual harrassment
Bro did any dudes get that pc memo cos he was serious about delivering it to all the female recruits , I know it’s an innocent attempt at following community guidelines but how does it prepare us for battle ?
by Hectic Mooslie October 08, 2023
When a dude steals your socks and sniffs your boxer shorts then deliberately gets busted because your mrs told him it turns her on when guys get busted doing weird shit after being an arsehole to her
Bro my mrs just owned that sock puppet because he got caught with my undies in a bag in his pocket and confessed to stealing them so he can sniff them everytime he gets horny because it makes him nut without touching his wang , look he even signed the confession I have a copy do you want one?
by Hectic Mooslie October 08, 2023
When you walk into a public bathroom with your girlfriend and a dude is taking a shit , so your girlfriend says ‘whoop whoop’ cos she just got hired at donut king
by Hectic Mooslie October 09, 2023
A ball bag with no contents that’s been left lying on the floor in the store room for anyone to trip on.
by Hectic Mooslie October 08, 2023
When A person who isn’t doing anything wrong is forced to start doing something wrong before it’s legalised anyway like smoke pot in Australia
Fuck that god guy with binoculars and a problem with people who have healthy colons just shit himself driving on the highway walked in my house while I was studying and started wiping his arse with my text books
by Hectic Mooslie October 08, 2023
Like the hamburgular but a mascot for the bed head community who’s job it is to waste successful peoples time and energy by stealing things they don’t like purely because they over slept once now they can’t seem to stop doing it it’s too hard
Fuck that turd Burgular broke in my house with a key , ate my cat , cos it’s not lazy , then choked the chicken , and busted a nut on my bed , I found him asleep in my bed wearing my cape
by Hectic Mooslie October 08, 2023
When ya devote ur time and money to someone and they don’t let ya talk to your chick friends then they leave when your in hospital with a smashed arse because it’s an awkward injury , then ya talk to them like any chick friend ya used to have cos ya got none left after her and no money to talk to anyone else but she acts like you didn’t earn the privilege after ya got a smashed arse because of her telling ya she likes it when her boyfriend has a smashed arse
Those spiffy tradiegasms smashed that dudes arse then called him a gay weirdo and fired him but he was just a customer who needed a roof leak fixed and they fired him but he paid them so he is actually right.
by Hectic Mooslie October 09, 2023