Harry flashman's definitions

klugle

The type of phlegm coughed up by a Klansman after smoking unfiltered Lucky Strikes for 30 years.

Conrad hacked up a huge pulsating klugle with veins in it after discovering that the previous patient on the dialysis machine was Afro-American and Medicare wouldn't do anything about it.

by harry flashman September 18, 2003

lattetude

A hyper attitude caused by too much caffeine.

Steer clear of Jolene this morning...she's got a lattetude.

by harry flashman August 29, 2003

Toadly-Wan-Kanobi

A high priest of toadliness, one who lives and practices the art of toadliness to a very high level, striving for toad nirvana. Can usually be spotted in public as the one alternately picking his nose and deeply scratching his ass with the same hand.

Yo! Toadly-Wan-Kanobi, try to keep your fingers out of the cheese dip.

by harry flashman July 4, 2003

mumbo

To speak without clarity.

I listened to Bubba mumbo 'bout traffic jams, gettin' pulled over for speeding and hitting a deer but dammit the pizza weren't only cold...he ate everthang but the crust.

by harry flashman July 30, 2003

SORTS

A nightmarish, coded, machine-read Naval message that is supposed to be a real-time methodology for reporting overall operational readiness to a vindictive and hateful computer in Washington D.C. that seizes upon a single minute error and then flames your commanding officer who then shits in your garrison hat.

I'd rather be in charge of the Combined Federal Campaign at the Norfolk Naval Brig and have a bleeding prostate the size of grapefruit than be the SORTS officer.

by harry flashman July 10, 2003

boffum

What a greedy redneck says when given a choice to have a pack of cigarettes or a six-pack of beer.

Gimme boffum.

by harry flashman July 15, 2003

limp dick

Slang name for erectile dysfunction. (See definition for dick splint for cure)

Until Congress passes a Medicare supplement for prescriptions like viagra I'm going to have to rely on popsicle sticks and duct tape...mighty tough to find willing partners though.

by harry flashman July 19, 2003