When a man has the ability to masturbate with either hand.
My right arm is in a cast but it's okay I'm ambidickstrous.
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A place where white people go to figure out what black people are talking about. Also known as the Blactionary.
1.
Black friend: It's Saturday night . . . Turn Up!!
White Guy: *thinking* Um, I guess that's a thing . . . I'll look it up on Urban Dictionary
or
2.
Black guy on vine: THOTs be like . . . yadda yadda yadda
White guy: WTF is a "THOT"? I'll go to Urban Dictionary and see if this deserves a revine.
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A vegan who will still eat crabs.
Let's go get crabs! Oh wait I forgot you're vegan.
It's okay I'm a Maryland Vegan
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When you are injured but can't feel it because you are so drunk.
I sprained my ankle I think, but it's fine I can walk I have a whiskey bandage.
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When Jews trade passive aggressive insults during a Passover seder.
Ester: (to heavy set sister) "I assume you want seconds . . ."
Sister: "No thanks it was a little dry"
Elijah: "I'm not stopping at that house they're being too passover aggressive"
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When someone tries to correct someone else, but in fact the correction is wrong.
George: I like this champagne.
Pete: Correction, it's actually just sparkling wine. It's only called champagne if it comes from the Champagne region of France.
George,: Actually that's an incorrection, because this sparkling wine IS from the Champagne region of France. So go fuck yourself Pete.
When you are outside in the cold without a coat but you are so drunk you feel warm.
Similar to a
whiskey bandage
Hey Caitlin aren't you cold out here in just that t-shirt?
Nah I'm good I got a liquor jacket.
