Frank Klaune's definitions

prostate pudding

Euphemism for cum, jizz, spoo, goo, baby gravy, white delight, slop, spunk, or sperm.

Jane's parents were alarmed when they found Jimmy's prostate pudding on her dress.

by Frank Klaune January 20, 2005

Bop the Top and Drop the Slop

"Masturbate and ejaculate." Humorous reference to male masturbation (and it's messy aftermath).

Man, no wonder Jimmy took so long in the shithouse. He had to bop the top and drop the slop.

by Frank Klaune May 28, 2004

spray paint

The forceful, sometimes violent expulsion of liquid shit into the toilet at high velocity. The "spray paint" term relates to the viewing of the underside of the toilet seat and the general condition of the toilet bowl which is usually well sprayed with dumpage.

"Man, I had such a gut cramp, I ran to the bathroom and let go with spray paint. Damn, it's a good thing we're at Frank's house. I wouldn't want to clean that up at my house."

by Frank Klaune March 6, 2004

ahs-wee-pay

Less commonly as of late, it is the phonetic, literal pronounciation of "asswipe" (said usually with a fake foreign accent). The term is used as a direct replacement for "asswipe" just with the foreign-sounding pronounciation for any of a number of stupid reasons.

"Hey ahs-wee-payyyy... wot's up mon?"

by Frank Klaune March 6, 2004

scratch the patch

Literally, for one to "scratch where it itches", in particular to scratch the genital area. Often seen as a sign of some disgusting disease or STD.

Man, Frank was picking up that chick in the bar, but when he saw her scratch the patch, he flipped her off and left. I think he figured she had VD or crabs or something.

by Frank Klaune November 13, 2004

Harry Palmer

The protagonist of K.J. Rowling's book. This ignorant teenage zitfaced twit received international acclaim for his masturbatory tendencies.

Man, did you read Rowling's latest Harry Palmer book?

by Frank Klaune November 13, 2004

barn drop

An unusual athletic maneuver used for excretion. The "barn dropper" shimmies up the stall wall in a public restroom with a high ceiling. With one foot on top of each side wall and the pants dropped, the barn dropper lets go with the dump. A successful barn drop results in the target (the toilet) sucessfully hit. The barn drop is a common tactic in men's dormitories and frat houses across the USA and often done in the presence of a large, loud drunken crown of well wishers and spectators.

"Damn, the other night we got back to the frat. I heard all this commotion, and there was a huge crowd at the party chanting while Jack was doing a barn drop. He missed the target. The janitor resigned the next day."

by Frank Klaune March 7, 2004