Fasters's definitions

Zero Marketing

When food and drink companies leverage on the health consciousness of its customers to claim that their products are free of additives, colorings, and seasonings; or have zero sugar, zero animal fat, and zero monosodium glutamate (MSG), which could cause cancer-prone diseases.

Zero marketing has permeated many businesses and industries: from banks and financial institutions offering zero interest rates or zero downpayment to food manufacturers offering zero cancerous or life-shortening products.

by Fasters May 29, 2021

Corona Calculus

When politicians enact unpopular, painful measures to reduce the number of Covid-19 infections and deaths, while tapping on the country’s financial reserves or borrowing money to procure as many vaccines, masks, ventilators, and PPEs for the population.

Had Donald J. Trump’s corona calculus been to minimize infection and death rather than scheme to reduce his business losses, and to maximize supplies of medical equipment and essential goods instead of benefiting himself and his cronies, he might still be serving a second term today.

by Fasters May 30, 2021

Make Pi Greater Again

The push by white Christian nationalists in red-pilled states for their politicians to legislate the value of π to align with its biblical value of 3, as inferred from 1 Kings 7:23 and 2 Chronicles 4:2, in exchange for their “holy votes.”

Just as the Pinocchio-in-Chief wants to make America greater again, a bigly proportion of ultra-MAGA patriots, who support other Pharisaic presidential candidates, want to make pi greater again.

by Fasters May 17, 2023

Piapple

An apple with π markings all over it, which is used as a cure for people who desire to overcome the fear of appearing foolish, as they conspicuously carry the defaced fruit around in public squares.

Guesstimate how many fearful folks worldwide would be bold enough to walk around with a piapple to train themselves to be thick-skinned.

by Fasters May 22, 2023

Anti-Pi Day

A hands-on educational event for math-anxious students and adults that would offer them some fun non-symbolic things to do on Pi Day—a mathematical equivalent of an anti-Valentine’s Day for singles.

To empathize with tens of thousands of kids who feel left out or alienated on Pi Day, a Singapore NGO is organizing a “Anti-Pi Day” concert to boost their low self-esteem in math.

by Fasters May 22, 2023

🐓 π

Short for “Chicken Pi.” A mathematical rebus that sounds like “chicken pie.”

At a KFC outlet in the “fine” city of Singapore, passers-by could spot the silhouette of a chicken and a π-like symbol meters apart. What are the chances that someone would interpret these two figures as 🐓 π?

by Fasters May 23, 2023

As Deadly as Pi

When Pi, the life-threatening Covid-19 variant of concern that came after the variant Omicron, was marginalized by WHO, as it fears that the politically incorrect or mathematically blasphemous label might unprovenly trigger a global outcry or protest among millions of math educators for whatever unspoken or irrational reasons.

From 2020–2023, many different types of Covid-19 variants were floating freely on the planet, but none was as deadly as Pi.

by Fasters May 23, 2023